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    DO YOU THINK IT'S POSSIBLE TO LOVE SOMEONE AND NOT LIKE THEM AT THE SAME TIME?

    I truly love my boyfriend but he's too judgemental and he's always putting me down. He mean well but it's too overwhelming. I try to tell him all the time, " you can't change a person. " This is who I was when we met ( and I pursued him ). I make stupid decisions true enough but there's no reasoning with him. And like they say, " you can't help who you love. " Now, I'm tired. I'm drained mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He's 60 years of age and loves to play mind games with me ( which don't work because I always reverse it on him ). He's manipulative and I'm fed up. I'm too strong and I refuse to tolerate anymore. I'm to the point now to where I'm convinced, it's okay not to be in a relationship. A piece of mind is more important. I've had two heart attacks and two strokes and this ass don't care. I don't want to walk away from this relationship but a peace of mind is mandatory for me. What do you guys think? Be blunt and extremely honest please. Thank you

    +4  Views: 802 Answers: 11 Posted: 13 years ago
    eggplant

    Get rid of him, he's an abuser. He fits the picture. Find someone else. If you marry this guy, he may begin to hit you and then tell you it's your fault. Find someone else, love. He is killing you. Again, show the bum the door.
    carmaxable

    absolutely right, eggplant!
    daren1

    funny i posted the same exact question.

    11 Answers

    When someone constantly picks on you it is because they are feeling somewhat threatened by you. To him, you must be a very intelligent woman and he is feeling less than that. He does not seem to like how it makes him feel so he is trying to get you below him. I have said many times before...water seeks it's own level. In saying that you met him at a point in your life when you were both that broken. Obviously you have begun to heal and he is stuck doing the same dysfunctional dance you both did when you met. It is easy for the viewer here to tell you to move on, but I know eventually you will have risen to a new level and will not accept what he is dealing you. Just keep in mind you are not a victim here because you are still accepting his behavior. We teach people how to treat us unfortunately.
    Sure, We get mad at loved ones all of the time.

    Carefully look at the reasons that you "love" your boyfriend. I disagree with you...you CAN help who you love. A real man doesn't need to put down his loved ones and play manipulative games. This situation is affecting your health!

    Sounds like he doesn't love YOU so my advice is move on!
    A good and heathy relationship is one where neither try to control the other and exept them for who they are. He is insecure and tries to be in control. You and your health are more important. Tell him to get help or move on. Peace of mind is essential for your health and wellbeeing.
    He's just a boyfriend now, don't consider taking this any further until he gets counseling. He sounds like a control freak. You will learn to hate him eventually.
    It's called ambivalance. I believe relationship should bring happiness for both parties and if it doesn't then why bother to have one.
    Yes i have done that,then the love that i did have, eventually ran out.
    yes i can count the people i love its far greater than those i like .. true love holds no grudges
    Sounds like an unhealthy relationship to me, I would walk away once I knew I have tried everything. It sounds like you are just about there, or maybe you've been there for a while, but just haven't done what you need to do yet...
    One line ...... kiss his ass adios !
    carmaxable

    kiss? dont you mean kick!
    varon

    That's what I meant .... thanks !
    Yes, I get that everyday from my wife.....please God help me!
    UPDATE.....I'VE DECIDED TO MOVE ON. IT'S OVER! I'D RATHER BE IN LOVE WITH A PEACE OF MIND! THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR OPINIONS/ANSWERS....I REALIZE, I SHOULD'VE PUT MYSELF FIRST FROM THE VERY BEGINNING.
    Colleen

    Moderator
    Good for you. Stick to it. No one is more important than you are ;)
    ed shank

    Good move. We learn something from even a bad situation. Makes us a little smarter next time around. Good luck.


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