Can you make someone interested in a cause when they are depressed? and how

    85 and living alone and so depressed. Some fear also but doesn't want to learn a new skill...not interested in tape recording her memories...attracting birds in backyard...crotchet...She is more than capable.
    I need your help.

    +2  Views: 434 Answers: 4 Posted: 10 years ago

    4 Answers

    Leave her be. She knows her age. She needs to live her days as she wants to. What you see as depression is her letting go because she's ready to go. You can not force people to live when they just want to go. I'm sure she's seen all and done all that she wanted. It's hard for the living to see others who just want to move on. I know, I've been there. I had to learn not to look at my own feelings. I had to look at theirs and love them enough to let them do what they felt was best for them self. She has the two things of comfort she needs, birds and crocheting. Ask her what she really wants to do and then let her do it. I learned how to love without restrictions when my grandfather asked me for permission to die. I was trying to keep him alive. He asked me if he could die because he was tired and just wanted to go. It's then when I realized I had been trying to control him, make him live when he didn't want to out of my own selfish needs. I told him if he was truly ready to go, then I would not try to keep him here. He passed away a few days later. I never left his side for the whole time (I had him living here in my house with me). I just sat and loved him. That's all I could do.
    A depressed person is usually not interested in anything except what is absolutely necessary to get by. You cannot make them do anything.

    Your friend might need to see her doctor. Could be a medical problem. Once a medical problem is ruled out including depression, try to find activities for people of her age group and ask her to go with you.

    Maybe she would like to rock crack babies at the local hospital or visit the local library.

    Don't shut yourself in with her. Make sure you get some help if not from family, then local Elderly Agencies. Look in the blue pages of your local phone book for government agencies.

    Good Luck. I wish you both well
    At 85 their entitled to do whatever they choose or not choose to do. See a doctor though, make sure the person isn't covering something up.
    I agree at 85 they can do as they wish they earned it

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