7 Answers

"The Pearl is in the River"

From the movie Under the Rainbow.  The actor was actually saying,  "The pearl is in the liver."

"How much for the little girl?"

John Belushi in the Blues Brothers.

"Feed the tuna mayonaise.'  From Night Shift.

 

It was the delivery of these three lines that sticks in my head also,

 "No one has ever died in the Thompson River... no one dies in the Thompson."  I am glad that was/is true and it makes me laugh because river rafting is a hoot and that was a great day.

13 years ago. Rating: 10
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We were at a gathering recently and one of my sons

was tending the campfire. One of his friends was bringing

an armload of cut up wood over to add to the pile.

My son didn't know his buddy was behind him and if he'd

turned around he woud have gotten a 2 x 4 in the face, so

I said, "Look out, Steve's behind you with wood."

My son blithely rejoined, "Thanks, Mum. You always have

my back". 

Suddenly everyone burst out laughing and

it took me half a sec to catch on, believe it or not. :)  

 

13 years ago. Rating: 10
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"Beer, the cause of and solution to all of life's little problems"
- Homer Simpson.

13 years ago. Rating: 8
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"Mama always said life's like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get."

~ Forrest Gump

13 years ago. Rating: 8
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When ever I lose the kid scissors, or the glue, or the sturdy paper, I get upset and scurry around trying to find the missing item. My four-year-old grandaughter pats my arm and kinda whispers, itsotay!, Grandma, itsotay!  just wanna hug her little chubby self and do if the timing is right.

 

13 years ago. Rating: 8
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A 60 something friend of mine was called to a job interview at one of our Burger chain restaurants.

The overwhelming majority of employees are in their teens, working for the first time. Normally working part-time during school months or they see it as a great summer job.

My 60 something friend was asked during his interview, "So, where do you see yourself in 10 years?"

To which he replied, "I'll probably be pushing up daisies."

Also, I like a line that sounds as if it may be a W.C. Fields quote;

"She was a moonshiners daughter, but I loved her still."

Still another by Emo Phillips;

My girlfriend told me that she had been seeing another man. So I said, "Why don't you try rubbing your eyes or something!"

 

 

13 years ago. Rating: 4
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wow like it

 

12 years ago. Rating: 2
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