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    My daughter whom I have raised as a single parent & have always placed on a pedestal has moved less than 1 hr away,she has recently graduated university & holds a very respectable position in her neighbourhood.She rarely visits,& yet she finds no qualms about travelling with her professional friends who share lavish lifestyles.Is it because I have a low income & cant measure up to her lifestyle that i'm not worthy of her company?

    0  Views: 310 Answers: 4 Posted: 11 years ago

    4 Answers

    Sorry but she is living her life now. Untie the apron strings. She is an adult who now has a mother and not a mommy. You are suffering empty nest syndrome. Do not expect her to fix it for you. Let her live her life. She will come around when she wants to visit mother. She is living and experiencing. Did you visit your mother all the time when you left home? Did you do your own thing and go out with your friends all the time when you left home? If you spent too much time with mom after you left home, then you were not ready to leave the nest. If you didn't go out having fun with your friends after you left home, you should have. Do not make her feel guilty for enjoying her life. Find a hobby to occupy the emptiness at home. 

    This is natural it would seem.  Now it's time for you to do your thing... Find yourself again.  This is a difficult time in your life but it does get easier.


    Good luck.  I am told that eventually they do come swimming back.

    itsmee

    Yes indeed, Dr. Fishlette. : D

    I'm very sorry to hear this.


    Perhaps you should review your relationship up until present.


    Where you always close and things have changed?


    There is also the fact that when children fly the nest, they


    want to spread their wings and not feel dependant on their


    parent. Stay in contact with her by phone and she'll probably


    start visiting again after the novelty of her new-found freedom


    has worn off.

    betty.bradbury.3

    There was never a question of Love,I am so proud of her accomplishments,just miss her & the bond we shared.Thanks so much for your kind response.
    Dardaigh

    You are welcome. Take care, this difficult time will pass. :)
    itsmee

    You’re a mom, Dardaigh. I can tell. Love isn’t easy. Is it?

    Yes, Betty ~ You’re sad. I’m sorry. My kids have been gone for awhle. When my daughter first left I was heartbroken but would not have let it show for anything. I told people who didn’t know her. I wept in silence of my room. Terrible.  Oh so so so bad. 


    Now years have gone by and SHE lives around the corner from me and she brings her babies for me to cuddle and coddle. Sometimes I wished she lived farther from me ... really.


    My son is another story. He’s in various weird parts of Peru. He’s on a high mountain where there isn’t enough Oxygen. (A mother’s nightmare) I will not see him for THREE years. Do I cry. Oh yes, I do. Does he know. No way! Does he know I worry my hat off? No way!


    It will get better. Hang on. Send a gift occasionally. Be out of town frequently. Be a little mysterious to her.  She’ll be back. You sound like a very lovable mother. You did a good job with your little girl!


    A Mom 2



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