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    how do you tell a close friend you want more then friendship. he's hetorosexual and i'm a gay man.

    We have been friend's for many year's. we except each other's lifestyle's.  Over the year's most people think that were lover's. We let anyone know were just friends... and that is the truth.

    0  Views: 1038 Answers: 10 Posted: 12 years ago
    Colleen

    Moderator
    You do not have a lifestyle unless you are a straight man choosing to be gay. A lifestyle is a choice. You have a life. He has a life. You live the homosexual LIFE. He lives the heterosexual LIFE. You never hear straight people say, "I am living my lifestyle as a straight person", do you? Because they believe their heterosexuality is not a choice. Well my homosexuality is not a choice either, nor should yours be.
    millie111

    :-)HERE HEAR!!!:-)...IE I MEAN "here here":-)LOL!!..(Ano grumpy morning)!!!lol...Little Miss Sunshine here!!:-¬
    Colleen

    Moderator
    Hey millie, did you see how he avoided my answer? Apparently the gay men still have issues with lesbians. They still avoid us like we are their enemy. I've never understood that way of being. Gay or straight, men are strange.
    millie111

    Yes I did!!...UNITED WE STAND!!:-)lol!...it NEVER CEASES TO AMAZE ME HOW MANY GAY MEN I`VE ASKED WHY THEY HATE US..THEY A L W A Y S DENY IT!!???..I don`t see the threat to ANYONE??..QUE SERA!!:-)lol...MAYBE I JUST DON`T UNDERSTAND THE HUMAN RACE ANYMORE!!:-Z..OK..Am going out shopping now to SCARE THE WORLD!!!:-)lol!..(If they let me in the shops)?!rotfl:-0
    country bumpkin

    Moderator
    Why do gay men hate lesbians?
    Colleen

    Moderator
    I think certain ones just do not like women.

    10 Answers

    If you would like to keep your friend then keep your feelings to yourself.  It would be a shame to scare your friend off and not enjoy the friendship any longer.  You can't make your friend gay just as much as your friend can not make you heterosexual.... Nature is nature.


    Good Luck and I do hope you find the right person for you... the soul mate kind.

    SweetTee

    Your right i value my friendship with him more then... taking a chance like that... I could be in love with him just as we are. I wont bring it up.

    You don't. Take this from a lesbian. You keep your mouth shut and get over your feelings. His friendship should be more important to you. You can not cross the line. If you do, that is disrespecting him and his sexuality. Then you are not being his friend. This is what makes our lives tough but you get stronger than your feelings, you over come them and keep your relationship with your friend exactly where it needs to be....a friendship.  Find someone who is gay that you can turn your affections to. That is what you're suppose to do. Your heterosexual friend does not need the burden of your feelings. I have a feeling people think the two of you are lovers because that's how you treat him. Stop it. He's extremely gracious to put up with it but you need to stop. He's not your lover. You are not living in reality. 

    millie111

    YOU SO DON`T!!!:-)
    Deleted User

    He doesn't get it :/
    millie111

    @Wonderdyke...NO..I don`t think he wants to even try to understand??!!:-?
    Deleted User

    He will when his mate clips him...

    You are about to lose a close friend, it may be hard enough for him to accept your sexuality, by telling him you want some mojo you may as well kiss that friendship goodbye.


    You are gay do not push your sexual preference on someone whom has been there for you.


    You are thinking "lust" not love.. Have you not heard of a gay club this is where you could meet someone with one main common interest you both are attracted to men.


    Your friend is not your lover you seem rather confused, time to get yourself a fag hag :)

    Good advise here. Pay attention and learn a lesson in life.

    You don't. Why ruin a good thing? He is straight and not going to change just like you aren't going to.......

    The first question I asked of akaQA is whether one could have sex with a friend and keep the friendship.  The answer was a resounding NO; it's not likely.


    Accept your friend as he is.  Accept your friendship as it is.  

    millie111

    I know some of my friends have"FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS"!:-)...it seems to work for most of them..as long as both parties accept that they are cool with what they are doing!...it wouldn`t be my choice..but ea to their own!!LOL!:-)
    ed shank

    Wher's your picture. The cemetary is uncool.
    Bob/PKB

    HEY! That is NOT a cemetery. It's part of the Christmas card I painted for 2011. I am not a very good artist, but the message of the whole card was meaningful for me. Sorry you can't see it in its entirety;
    The forefront is Mary and Joseph, with baby Jesus. The "cemetery" is the hill where Jesus and the two other "bad guys" were crucified. There is a red box with a green bow surrounding the image you can see, and it is kind of like a "diorama", because you can see what is in the box. The point is that we have Christmas because God gave us the gift of Jesus; then Jesus gave us the gift of eternal life by sacrificing his life for us.
    It's how I feel, though many others disagree.

    I have a best mate thats gay, he has a man but he would have liked me  am not that way, you just to have to be friends. don't lose a friend

    millie111

    great answer williamtheman!:-)

    I think you're barking up the wrong tree. If you want more intimacy with him , and he's hetero, and you're gay, it ain't gonna work.

    Deleted User

    LOL @ barking up the wrong tree :))))

    I find it strange that gay men hate women, as apparently lesbians often ask gays to be sperm donors when they want to get pregnant. We straights have enough trouble trying to understand our own women let alone those of other inclinations

    Colleen

    Moderator
    Not all gay men hate lesbians. I should have clarified better. I think some gay men just hate women all together.
    millie111

    @Colleen..no not all..just quite a lot in my experience!!:-¬
    carmaxable

    they just jealous `cause the women are prettier, and they cant compete!!!! hahaha
    Colleen

    Moderator
    No, gay does not mean the person wants to change their sex or be the other sex. That would be a transsexual and they are not gay, they just are not the body they were born into.
    Deleted User

    There was a stigma some time ago in the 80's where gay men did not want Lesbians being apart of the Australian Mardi Gras, this was the case until the aids out break and the gay men found that the best support for them was the lesbian population.


    As for gay men hating woman, they don't hate woman at all like lesbians don't hate men we just don't sleep with them, its a sexual preference what we are as individuals attracted to, like yoy don't like every person of the opposite sex it works the same way..

    Just be honest, and catch him at the right moment, ask him, he will either say yes or no, and u can either move in or move on. Hope this helps.



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