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    LOVE/RELATIONSHIP ADVICE NEEDED!!

    Hello readers,I have a relationship question that I desperately need answers or advice for.My good friend and I went for a couple of drinks and I ended up driving home while I was a little tipsy. While I was driving my boyfriend called and asked where I was and I told him I was on my way home after some drinks with a friend.He immediately got angry and said I made a bad choice (which is true, but I was in a middle of sobering up so driving was actually not a problem). He then started saying mean things about my friend over the phone. My boyfriend and I were chatting over the phone until I was almost home. We hung up and spoke this morning.He continued his yelling and nagging for being irresponsible and I became a bit irritated so I told him to relax and that I got home safe. He hung up on me.He called me about 15 minutes later and I missed the call but received a text from him shortly saying he wanted to break up. Lately, we've been experiencing a lot of troubles and fight often and break up often. We just got back together yesterday but he broke up with me because of this issue.Am i supposed to call or text him back?Or any other relationship advice are more than welcome!!!!!!!


     


     


     


    Relationship advice needed most please!!!


     


     


     


    THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR THE FEEDBACK.


    Although we did get back together..... and we couldn't have been happier.


    But I have one other question about this relationship again.. and feedback is always welcome.


    If you have the time, please check it out and let me know what you think.

    +2  Views: 964 Answers: 15 Posted: 11 years ago
    doolittle

    Ok shouldn't have driven..and really should not have been on the phone while driving...but it is over, everyone is safe, and hopefully you wont do it again.

    15 Answers

    First of all you are very lucky that you arrived home safely.  You are very fortunate that no one was killed.  Drinking and driving is a criminal offense.  Sobering up while you were driving?  That is irresponsible. 


    Secondly, I hope that when you were talking on the phone to your boyfriend, your phone was on speaker and/or not a hand held device.


    You have a Guardian Angel on your side.


    A friend does not let a friend drive drunk.


    Your boyfriend is your boyfriend or he is not.  If You don't like what he says then end it.  I seriously doubt that he is wrong for being angry with you because you were driving drunk.  What he should have told you is to pull over and then  come and picked the two of you up.


    Thank your lucky stars that you didn't kill someone and that you are not sitting in a jail cell at this very moment.  I know a few people who have ruined their life and ended the lives of others for doing what you did.  Smarten Up! 


    Imagine loosing a family member to a drunk driver... just imagine! 


    Imagine killing someone because you drove your car while drunk... drive to the closest jail in your area and really truly imagine what it would be like to sit inside that building because you killed someone while driving under the influence of alcohol. 


    We have a very good family friend who lost her grandson to a drunk driver.  That drunk driver was her grandson's best friend.  That best friend is now sitting in jail for the next 7 years.  Plenty of time to think about things.... What do you think?


    A vehicle is a weapon... a weapon that can kill.  

    lindilou

    Thanx Fishie.Couldn't respond to this one as I've lost so many loved ones to people like this....le' boo and le' hoo!...
    Russrocks

    Yours was an excellent answer, Fishlet! Good job!

    Fighting and breaking up all the time, is not how a relationship should be.  It's time to let go, once and for all.  Find someone with whom you have lots in common and have fun!

    Ducky

    Moderator
    And don't drive when you are under the influence of anything....EVER!!!

    Let it be. He made his decision. It sounds like a long break is what you both need. I think you keep coming back together again out of desperation or the fear of being alone. The relationship as it is, does not sound like a healthy one. I would not call or text him. I do agree though, you should not have been driving, even if you were "sobering up". That is irresponsible. Take a cab next time or call someone for a ride. 

    Forget him. It sounds as if he wanted out anyways..............

    Now, about this guy....he chose to stay on the phone with you...while you were driving and had admitted to have had a few drinks.  Hmmm, could it be it was more important for him to prove his point and be nasty than make sure you were safe??  He didn't nicely offer to pick you and your friend up or tell you to call when you got home but talking to him on the phone wasn't safe???  Why was he nasty to your friend???  She didn't force you to drink.  He sounds a bit immature and not very caring...a good long break from him while you have fun with your friends (split a cab) and meet nice guys sounds like a good plan to me.  


    P.S.  Don't call him or text him... and if he asks for an apology simply say "I'm soory I picked up your call while I was driving" or "I'm sorry you didn't offer to pick us up"

    facebook

    Anyone driving under the influence has no excuse and arguing on the phone even make it worst. If her boyfriend didn't offer her a ride does'nt give her the right to risk herself and other.
    doolittle

    f.b. I agree. Cabs are nice and comfy when you need a safe ride home!

    Here's what you should do:


    1.  Do not drink and drive.


    2.  Do not text and drive.


    3.  Do not talk on the phone and drive.


    It seems like your boyfriend cares about your safety way more than you do, but he didn't handle it well and neither did you.  Both of you need to get over it and move on. 

    doolittle

    He didnt handle it well at all. (kids today! :) -both of 'em)

    He texted to you that he wanted to break up?
     
    You didn't say you wanted to get together again.  You didn't say you missed him.  You didn't say you wanted help in getting along better.  You didn't say you love him.

    I would suggest you put your phone in the trunk when you drive.  I would suggest the next time HE calls, you tell him you want to accept and respect his decision to break up and wish him well.  Say "good bye" before you HANG UP for the LAST TIME.  

    You will both be better off. 

    lindilou

    And if she's drunk she should get in the trunk too...and let someone else drive!!

    If you had no intention of being intimate with this other guy, your only explanation to him was drinking and driving.  No need to apologize for anything else.  He's frustrated because he needs total control over you.  It's going to get worse.  Do NOT text him back any more.  Let it sit for a couple of weeks, then evaluate your relationship.  You may have to break up eventually.


     


     

    Russrocks

    You assumed the friend was a guy. I assumed it was a girl. I wonder which it was?

    Are you not sick of on again, off again ?Seems this time you have really upset him by drinking and driving, in which i don't blame him.Maybe this guy is not right for you, nor you for him.I would not chase him up or return his texts, unless you want to continue playing the break-up game all over again.

    It sounds to me that you should let him go and work on yourself for awhile. Try to figure out why you are engaging in high risk behavior (drunk driving) and then find a way to replace that behavior with positive behavior in your life. Fighting with a bf all the time is stressful. Do you crave the drama? Once you figure yourself out and find the peaceful place in your heart then you can accept new people into your life and cultivate positive relationships. Best of luck to you.

    This is a no-brainer. This man and you were not meant for each other. You will meet someone who will be a lot easier to get along with , that you'll have fun with and will be able to communicate with .

    Drunk and on the phone talking and texting! Is your brain already dead?  Take a BIG break and make some wise choices!

    He was right to yell at you for drinking and driving!!!....It doesn`t sound like a match made in Heaven..does it...if you argue within hours of being back together...I`D cut my losses and run...but that`s just my opinion!!....If you both want it to work out then sounds like you need to communicate more and put HUGE effort into it!!


    GOOD LUCK!!

    Immature actions displayed in relationship and safety of self also others. My advice, accept that you are not ready to have a relationship of this intensity.


    Take time Out, and search within self how better you can Live in this life that is respectful to yourself and friends and how your actions can impact on others.


    Identify, grow, rejoice Live..

    THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR THE FEEDBACK.


    Although we did get back together..... and we couldn't have been happier.


    But I have one other question about this relationship again.. and feedback is always welcome.


    If you have the time, please check it out and let me know what you think.


     



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