I think the best thing you can give your child is to let them know that you love them at that you will be there for them no matter what the causes are.

    +3  Views: 684 Answers: 11 Posted: 11 years ago

    11 Answers

    Even if they tell you at some point they are homosexual? Will you still love and support them then and NOT try and change them if they are secure in who they are?

    This is a test of a parents true and unconditional love.

    ed shank

    Being gay is not a criminal offense. If one of my family were to reveal they are gay, oh well. I'm surprised at what I'm reading here Colleen, you of all people. A "true test of unconditional love". Were talking being gay. Not a murderer, pediphile, rapist. If this would be a test for your parents, find new parents.

    Do you know how many kids get thrown out in to the streets daily because they tell their parents they are gay? I donate money to a home in California for kids (some as young as 12 yrs old) who no longer have a home or family because their parents threw them out and turned their backs on them just because they are gay. Speak to those parents, not me. Those kids were not criminals.

    My parents accepted me. They knew before I did and let me figure it out on my own. They have always supported me and stood up for gay rights whenever they could (my father has passed away) but my mother still stands. My father loudly and proudly spoke of his lesbian daughter. My mother has been know to walk up to people in public if they were talking down about gays and just quietly say, my daughter is a lesbian. Each time, the people have apologized for their words.
    ed shank

    I commend you on your good deeds. I could throw my son out in the street for stealing, drugging, inflicting pain on someone, but never for their sexual preference.

    good attitude

    Totaly agree..

    I agree..but the name you chose-what is that all about?

    I agree.

    Easy, love them and be there no matter what..................

    Absolutely, even when something they may have done is unacceptable it's important they know you may not be happy with their actions, but you still love and care for them

    Yes i agree......It is called unconditional love.

    I will always be there for my children and love them, no matter what.

    HELL NO. What are guys thinking? Your diliquent drug crazed son comes home after a burglary, having beaten some old lady half to death and your going to defend him. Your crazy. Although a hypotheical that I just quoted here, it happens everyday. And you wonder why our kids are FU today.  Parents should reward when doing good and be the first to point out disgusting behavior. Assuming responsibility for bad behavior is a parents job. You don't disown them you go on loving them, but love is also earned. Sorry but your all wrong on this one.  


    I disagree. I think you are wrong. Unconditional love is loving them even when they do these things. This does not mean you agree with their acts and try to save them from their punishment, you would actually want them to face their punishment but you love them just the same. God (if you believe in God) will take care of the rest. Love is given freely with no expectations of getting something in return. This is true unconditional love. Respect is earned, not love.
    ed shank

    Thankfully most kids don't get into the serious activity I presented in my comment. But there are children out there that do terrible things. They have lost their humanity. When a pattern of destructive behavior continues and others suffer deliberate bodily harm or death I can no longer love that person regardless of sharing the same DNA. I have to say that I disagree with you. I'm certain that my wife would have answered this question as you did.

    @ Colleen Well said!!!! Animals understand unconditional love but many of us have to learn it if our parents gave 'conditional' love.

    I love and support my children in all their efforts to lead lives that are productive, socially responsible, and healthy in mind, body, and soul.   
    My middle son is in jail.  I visit him, I write to him, I send him books or care packages occasionally, and I make his car payment for him (using his money).  I've got most of his stuff in my garage.  
    My eldest son has problems everyone is tired of hearing about, and I support his every good effort to live a clean life and take care of his family and himself as a law-abiding citizen.
    My youngest son got engaged about two weeks after meeting his fiancee. He thinks he should take a small fortune and live in Las Vegas, "earning" $215/day playing Roulette. I support his desire to have a wonderful marriage and provide for his wife and their eventual family.
    I neither condone nor support their drug use, misdemeanor and/or felony activities, belief that gambling is a sensible way to earn a living.   I will love them and help them in every way I possibly can.  Sometimes, the BEST way for me to help them is to NOT help them. 
    ed shank makes a valid point.  I love my sons unconditionally, but it is difficult to actually LIKE them sometimes.  


    ed shank

    Bob. Apparently you have had your share of disappointments with your boys as have I. My son for a while was totally out of control. Jail, bail, lawyers, court etc; Those parents commenting here have not been subjected to the disappointments and eventual disgust of what their children have done not just to themselves but the family as well. My son eventually got his s*** together and has been a descent human being since. That would not have happened had I defended his anti social behavior behavior at the time. I myself was out of control for a while, due to my drug use. Thankfully I was able to get it together. Your absolutely right, it can be difficult to "like" them. I guess you have to, as a parent go through the insanity to feel the hurt and disappointment of a bad person, even though it is your child. Thank you for understanding the point I was trying to make. As far as those who's comments were contrary to mine, may you never have to endure the destruction bad behavior can cause the family.

    AMEN to that!

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