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    Is respect limited only to adults, or should adults respect young people as well?

    My adult roommate believes he should be able to enter the rooms of my 20 yr old and 16 yr old sons. I believe if they have done nothing to warrent suspicion that their doing something wrong and if their obeying house rules we should not go into their rooms without respectfully entering thus teaching them respect by example. He feels that because they don't pay the bills and are still being provided for that basically the adults have full control and run of the house. I dont agree with this

    +2  Views: 535 Answers: 8 Posted: 10 years ago

    8 Answers

    Adults should show respect to children. Teach by example is my motto. You should also respect their privacy when they get to their teens, but of course you do need their trust & visa versa.

    mmm, I think this would depend on who the resident belongs to. If this were my house, I would go into any room anytime I want. It is after all, my house. If the house is your house and so are the kids then you would have the final say on this issue. If you and your roommate are involved in a relationship then the issue would have to be discussed between the two of you and resolved. At any rate, no matter how old the kids are, if they are not contributing to the household, they really have no rights given they are old enough to make contribution to the household. The 20 year old should be, in my opinion, on his/her own and not living at home still. (I don't know your situation though and there may be a good reason the 20 yr old is still at home) The 16 year old however, is still a child and therefore is open to inspection at any time. The contributions of the 16 yr old are in the form of assigned household chores since focus for that child should be on school, not work and income. Respect? There has got to be more involved than simply respect. 

    dad59

    Even if, you own that doesn't permit you to enter without a warrant or permission of the dweller. If you permit that person(s) occupancy, then you enter without warrant/permission then you've just committed a felony, because the occupant has possession and possession is 9/10ths the law.
    j.alanhutchinson

    you may be right on this dad59 but in my house, I own it. If someone is ion my house (and actually I do have some guests staying with me right now on an extended stay) I will go into any room anytime I want to. TO your point though, I certainly understand the need for privacy but felony or not, the guests are in my house and I will at all times know what is going on in my house. The whole 9/10's law thing don't wash with me and should not with anyone. They do not possess anything, they are using a room in my house. As for this particular situation with this lady's kids, the youngest is only 16 and in my opinion is subject to inspection at any time. Again though, as I stated in my reply to her, this all would depend on what kind of arrangement she and the roommate are in be it a romantic involvement, is it her house, is it his house etc. You are right, everyone should have a degree of privacy but there is no law that says I have to have a warrant to enter into a room within my own home. You are incorrect on this. It would be different if I had a room that someone is renting, then indeed, I would have no legal right to enter into what would then be considered their residence. This is not the case though. No warrant is needed, no court order is required. Thanks for your comments though, I look forward talking further on this and other things that come up.

    Respect the young ones.  Get rid of your stupid adult roommate.

    Colleen

    Moderator
    Not so stupid. Read my comment under Umbriel's stupid remark.

    Who owns, do you or your son's pay any housing, this falls in grey area, being your roommate isn't a parent/guardian they legally don't have any right to enter without permission (ENTERING WITHOUT BREAKING, INVASION OF PRIVACY) comes to mind.  File criminal charges or move or make them move if, they don't own it.

    Why is this person your roomate? Is it a boyfriend of yours or are you renting the place with them? IF he is responcible for what is n=i the house then.. I can understand his concern... How ever it is strange that you would allow it.


    To answer your question... respect should be universal.

    It is obvious that young peole should be shown respect, however they have not live long enough to experience life in the same manner as their elders.  I understand that things are different, but I do not see my grand children's life experiences  as I do their parents. Every thing that feels good isn't necessary right or healthy, children must be taught and accept conquencies

    I'd worry about teens having drugs in the home where I was an adult and the mother allowed them a do not enter my room policy. A mother like that is irresponsibly oblivious to the fact that teens will be teens. The roommate has every right to protect himself from a drug bust even if the mother doesn't care about that. Perfect kids take drugs and drink alcoholic. They are kids.


     


     

    Becky if the house belongs to your roommate, you need to move and get a place of your own where you can coddle your kids for as long as you want without anyone invading their/your privacy. 20 years old is a man. Why is he not paying rent?


    If the house belongs to you, ask the roommate to leave and get a new one who doesn't care if your kids might be keeping drugs in the house.


    If you are renting the apartment/house together, flip a coin, the loser moves.


     



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