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    whats the hardest thing you ever had to do?

    +9  Views: 1789 Answers: 30 Posted: 8 years ago

    30 Answers

    watch my beautiful husband die for 4 months, then take his clothes and things to the funeral home I tried to plan his funeral about 3 days before he died, but I cried so much , the funeral director could hardly get anything out of me. Then, I had to go to 2 funerals for him ----and open casket too.....one in Mich, and one in Ohio; b/c some of his family members (including his son ! ) were too lazy to come up to Michigan for the funeral
    mycatsmom

    P.S. He had bladder cancer that went to his bones and a few of his organs :-(
    doublehelix

    Sorry for the loss
    Mr.Den

    Yes that is hard......but I see you were strong enough to go thur it.......... one day you may be there for some one else
    michmar118

    So, so sorry. Cannot even imagine. Very best of friendship and love to you and your family.
    Sometimes just going through life is the most difficult thing to do, or so it seems. I believe like Daren said loosing loved ones is one of the hardest things to do, lost my dad to cancer...

    Now I have a nasty back injury and sometimes can't get around to well, I think that the pain is very difficult to handle at times. But, I believe recovering from surgery is probably the most difficult thing to do. I
    daren1

    thank the good lord our suffering is not in vein
    IamPamela313

    leeroy, hope all is well with you :-)
    leeroy

    Thanks you both, I'm fine just have to go take more pain meds, it really can effect your mood, wow. I used to have people in church ask me,"Are you mad or pissed off?"

    I would say,"No, why do you ask?" They would always respond,"It's because the look on your face." And then I would explain to them that I was just in pain and didn't realize I looked mean. lol But I'm o.k. thanks guys...
    Ann

    Leeroy, did you have surgery on your back? So sorry to hear you are in so much pain.
    leeroy

    Not yet, the doctor is recommending it, there's only a fifty, fifty chance it will help with the pain. I don't want to do it, I would like to keep that as my last option.

    I did have surgery in CA, it took quite a long time to fully recover but, it wasn't back surgery, thanks for your kind comment though.
    varon

    Leeroy, my prayers are with you.
    leeroy

    Thank you so much, maybe that's why I feel a little better today?
    doublehelix

    aw, my dad has back pains too, it's sad to see him suffer like that. Hope YOu recover without the need for surgery :)
    leeroy

    Thanks, I was born with a disk problem L-5. S-1. so I'm told, I am still very active when I can be, thanks for the nice comment.
    Seven years ago a dog that developed a brain tumor and not knowing who I was any longer, mauled my hand. I never knew how painful it would be to have to end the life of something that I loved so much.

    I sat with my Mom until she died of congestive heart failure 4 years ago.


    IamPamela313

    sorry for the lost of your MoM and your canine :-)
    Ann

    I know how you feel. I lost my dog Shirra too and it is the unconditianal love that they give, its what makes them so special. So sorry about your mom and your best friend.
    Poppy3

    6dogs4us - how very sad for you - the only doge I had in my adult life had a rare condition - adrenal tumours - cost me a fortune but I and my friends loved him so very much. He belonged originally to an old lady who died. I had to have him put to sleep eventually and remember just howling on the floor - even went the wrong way home after seeing him put to sleep - the vet said he was so happy - had to take him to the head vet who said bring him to me with respect to the young vet his notes read like 'War and Peace'.
    Quitting smoking.

    daren1

    im tring not very easy
    mycatsmom

    I wish my only problem was quitting smoking. I quit a long time ago.
    Jenn

    My dad is dying form lung cancer and we found out today my little cousin 23 yrs old has lung cancer and I am still smoking... God please take these cursed things from me. Before I am only a memory to my own children.
    FreedomFighter

    I know you will do it Jenn. :)

    Poppy3

    FreedomFighte - I am also trying - driving me crazy - I have all the stuff - Patches inhaler, lozenges - Haven't used the patches yet. Pharmacist when I am ready to let him know also there is a tablet called champix - if that's the right spelling. I seriously have to stop soon. I also have electronic cigarettes the re-chargeable ones also the single one you buy and then can dispose of but now I hear next month they are going to print results of research on these - as although it claims only nicotine - this is dubious as although vapour helps the production of smoke - researches believe this is not the only ocmponent and will be looking at these products to see what they actually contain. Smoking is said to be the most addictive drug one the market even more so than heroin. Good book - I beleive I lent mine to a friend who gave up - many people did when they read it - must get this again. Allen Carr's Easy Way To Stop Smoking - there is also a video have the box but no video inside. Yes you can see the problem has been around for some time. Good luck!!
    Fighting my addiction.
    Seeing my father when he was in a coma for 16 days and then seeing him die.
    daren1

    sorry for your loss.. at least now hes not suffering
    leeroy

    Sorry Ann, it's so difficult to loose someone you love. God will comfort us in these cases and give us that peace that passes all understanding, when we need it the most.
    Ann

    Thank you Daren and Leroy. I know he with God and I will see him again someday!
    IamPamela313

    sorry Ann, it had to be rough to watch a love one to go before your eyes :-)
    Ann

    Thank you IamPamela. It was very hard
    varon

    Ann, I am sorry for your loss. I know what you went trough. It happened with my father too, very painful. I believe what you said that we are going to see each other again.
    Ann

    Thank you Varon. I am sorry about your father. I know we will see them again Not that it makes it less painful, but it gives us hope.
    Poppy3

    Dear Ann - Seeing my Mamma - in hospital - appalling care - cannot get her little face out of my mind shortly before she died in July, 2012 - Oh my all these stories are so sad - I am blubbing here. Ann hope things are better for you now - I console myself by thinking my Mamma is in a better place and in peace now. xx
    for me it was having to watch my mother suffer merclessly from bone cancer!
    IamPamela313

    Thank God for giving you the strength to bare the burden for your mother :-)
    daren1

    theres comfort knowing she didnt die in vein
    mycatsmom

    they say bone cancer is the worst, most painfull kind . My late husb's cancer speard to his bones.His bro died of bone cancer when he was only 53.
    daren1

    wow thats way to young
    Ann

    I know someone who has bone cancer. He is only 50 yrs. old. He also came down w. Parkinsons when he was only 3o yrs. old.. So sorry about your Mom.
    Poppy3

    daren1 - Oh my the pain from bone cancer is excruciating - your poor mother - Just like IamPamela313 so brave of you and so good she had you. Hoping you are feeling OK - I am sure her pain has ceased to be. daren - see the smoking thing might help.
    I've had to make many decisions through the years which have caused me angst. No different than any one here. I agreed with other family members to pull the plug on my step-father last week, we are all in agreement, this is what he expressed in better times and would have wanted.
    daren1

    my prayers are with you and your family.......
    ed shank

    Thanx daren1, really do appreciate the thought. Peace.
    michmar118

    Wow, tough decision to make,...my respects.
    Poppy3

    ed shank - so very brave of you - you did the right thing, so right on many levels but mostly it was his wish. The same as michmar118 my respects to you and so much admiration.
    Giving birth.
    Poppy3

    Nene43 - never done this myself but funnily I watched a TV programme just last night called Don't Just Stand There....I'm Having Your Baby - really about teaching the husband how to support his wife during this manufacturing process. There were two ouuples and the two ladies were in just so much - much - much pain. Never seen this myself - only a caesarian birth.
    How to get out of a situation I don't like!
    Watch my formally robust older brother waste away and eventually die from aids. I also recently had to put my cat to sleep.
    Poppy3

    Ms Sinclair - how awful for you - I did the HIV course and actually looked after these patients - just so dreadful. I recently also had to have my cat put to sleep. Oh My.
    watching my husband slowly pass way. knowing there was nothing anyone could do. i did hold him in my arms as he passed. sometimes i still feel him in my arms.
    michmar118

    Hope you continue to feel him in your arms until you are reunited....
    Poppy3

    carmaxable - cannot add any more to what michmar118 has said - says it all. Keep well.
    Telling my children i have cancer.
    Blessings to all of you.

    I had to quit enabling my 29 year old daughter.
    daren1

    well at least you did some folks will put up forever
    Yvonne57

    Moderator
    thank you daren1
    Firing my best friend in the world.. Most painful experience.. but best friend he is, and still is.. Why upper management made me do this after I pleaded with them to find another way to dismiss him but not through me.. They wouldn't listen to me, no compassion, that's big corporations for you.. Only large corporation I ever worked for and i will never do it again.
    michmar118

    Major corporations SUCK!!! They care nothing about you as a person although they "say" differently. IS NOT TRUE! They lie through their teeth....
    Poppy3

    Vinny - I truly understand - I was in big trouble seven years ago for supporting a unfortunatly I did not use tact.
    It all seems so hard sometimes.. So much loss so much pain.. I cant put one tradgity above all else. But I know I will raise above it.
    JDB

    you go girl...
    Having to have a dog put to sleep. I have had to do it twice. I confess to crying like a baby and I am not ashamed to say so. Love my dogs.

    My father said the hardest thing he had to do whilst in the army in France in WW1 was to shoot his horse. The army horses could not be brought home for quarantine reasons.
    daren1

    i had to put my sister in laws dog down i cried all the way to and from ... and it wasn't even my dog.. so i can only imagine your pain!1
    PEOPLELOVER

    Thank you Daren.
    melandrupert

    Hello sweet heart I know what the pain is when its time to say good bye to our loyal freinds its so hard just remember it takes a man to cry and your poor dad what he must have gone through I can only imajine god bless him and you and all your dogs before xxx
    Poppy3

    PEOPLELOVE - know just how you felt - thank you as I knew like dogs lots of horses who help during Wars were left behind - but did not think of the quarantine element.
    Telling the Truth, like how i broke the news to my mum that her father died :(
    Colleen

    Moderator
    Hugs to you dh.
    doublehelix

    Thanks Colleen
    (((HUgeHug))) for you for your loss too
    Poppy3

    doublehelix - ouch. Your name so interesting - DNA - has a doublehelix.
    I think seeing my Mom in the condition she was in, but I still was not ready to let her go, that was hard, is still hard, do not know that I will ever get over it.
    Tell my wife I was married to another woman in the Ozark Mountains and had 5 other kids.
    leeroy

    lmao on this one...
    varon

    Wow TSC .... this is heavy
    TSC

    Its a joke. Jeeesh!
    TSC

    Could not imagine having more than one wife. I STILL can't figure THIS ONE out after 22 years. :(
    Poppy3

    TSC - how naughty can you get - joke - kinda funny though.
    I would say,saying goodbye to my cousin who I grew up very close with since childhood after his murder in 2009 just a few miles from my home,and giving my chihuahua away a couple days ago due to my current living situation,two beings that I cry and grieve for daily....this is why I have a man named Jesus in my life,he gives me strength daily.
    daren1

    you know youll never be alone with christ
    Debate foreclosure on my home.

    We had a fire at our house. Within 9 months, my husband had a stroke. We were homeless and staying at my daughter's small apt. I began trying to figure out how to start my business. The problem was because I was already in foreclosure, wasn't bringing home enough to help her. Not only that but, her boyfriend started messing around on her with a 16 year old. Still debating on letting go of that house. It's eating me up because it is the only thing, besides the kids, that is my own. I hardly believe in an American dream anymore. Hard to do! But, I'm happy for the day! Tonight comes, the day is passed! It's a good thing!


    Your sister,
    Ginger,
    Adreamer2
    IamPamela313

    keep the faith, this too shall pass :-)
    leeroy,
    i'm commenting here because my response disappears if i try to answer in the right place. i have had back problems for ten years. i take methadone and have a fair quality of life.
    the first five years were very difficult, i went all over california to the big hospitals to find a doctor who would tell me what was wrong and how to cure it.
    some offered surgery. others didn't.
    for the most part the doctors i trusted most told me to avoid surgery unless i lost control of my body functions or couldn't walk. i'm ok. my injuries and problems are way high on my spine - c5 -c6.
    i guess surgery is very difficult and often not successful.
    the most difficult thing i've gone through is the adjustment to pain and not being able to climb mountains ... stuff like that.
    be well.
    Poppy3

    itsmee - I too have problems with my back - lumber spine - two failed epidurals but I am old. There is a guy called Sheriac - sorry cannot remember the spelling who wrote a medical book on back pain an enormous book and he said never put a knife into the spine. Seems your Doctors were correct - hope you are coping with pain - I take these - may try the epidurals again - failed as they could not hit the right spot - mine being several lumar discs. Really such a nuisance as cannot do lifting even bending down etc.

    2002 my DAD had a heartache when he was having a heart Cather and I could not be  with him I was at work my mom and sister's they called me and the next day they did open heart surgery on him then complication's arose he is a diabetic at the hospital he had a very bad low sugar episode.He  picked up an staph infection this lead to him losing  a leg this  started in April to august then in 10-16-02 I went  in to work and a fellow worker told me you look all-full  I then asked my Boss may I go home I should have called some one to pick me up because I could hardly see any thing I wasn't thinking I drove my route that I used all the time my guardian angels where protecting me and others  I then stopped driving   I have not drove a  car ever since!! this was 10-16-02 the next day I went to see my primary Doctor I was so weak they had to push me in a wheel chair to enter his building when he saw me  he told me go to emergency!!  off we go to have the ever poplar tests!! they didn't show any thing and they wanted to send me home I said no that there is some thing  wrong!! and my older sister mom and Dad were their my sister made them take care of me when family is in trouble she is pretty stubborn then the next day a Doctor came  and told me that I had M.S he ordered a spinal tap to be done this showed 100 percent MS I  did not get home till December.This was because of therapy to regain some of what  was lost.Then last summer my Father had some more heartaches this time it was worse for me because I could not be their with my  family because of my M.S this stupid thing gives me seizures I don't  shake what happens at times I don't know where I am if I did not have GOD I would not know what to do. I am tired good night nice dreams everybody! My Dad died on 8/12/12

    whovin

    Thank you
    whovin

    You're welcome
    Poppy3

    So sorry whovin - I did know about your MS - I have read your profile. Really tough for you, take very good care of yourself and I hope it is not too progressive. Goodnight to you perchance to dream.
    whovin

    Thank you dopey.
    whovin

    My Dad he died on 8/12/12/

    Saying goodbye without speaking a word.....

    Poppy3

    What is reassuring to me jhhartan - is that you seem to get it! i.e. when I answered the question.
    Taking my chicken to the vet, to have her put down. She had a large tumour in the stomach.
    country bumpkin

    Moderator
    You must really love your chickens!*~*
    "SAY I DO"!

    You really wouldn't want to know probably take too long.

    go on the last level of sonic rush

    Some times answering  or  reading   these  comments   are   very  difficult...................

    Mr.Den

    Some of us seem to be part of a family here


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