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    what should u do if your mom is really nosey should i tell her?

    mom is so annoing/nosey. which drives me nuts.

    0  Views: 1636 Answers: 14 Posted: 9 years ago
    Tags: family

    14 Answers

    Be happy that you have a mom who cares enough to want to know what's going on in your life and what you're doing and not doing. Your right to privacy comes when you're an adult living on your own and paying your own way through life. Until then, your parents need to do the responsible thing and make sure you're not out in the world acting like a delinquent and hanging out with gangs and trouble makers. Good on your mom!
    Just in case any of you didn't read my reply to Colleen, I had the impression this was a young person living at home, lacking in confidence.

    The UK are BEGINNING to put responsibilty for children's actions on their parents, as is obviously the case in America, and not before time.

    It would help if they didn't, at the same time, threaten to prosecute good parents on the say-so of a child as young as 7 or 8, who complain to a teacher they have been HIT, abused.

    Most of the parents I know either use the "naughty step" idea, which seems to work... or maybe a slap on a small hand about to touch something dangerously hot.

    Anyway, my advice is retracted.

    What is she nosey about?

    Possibles >>

    Your mail. Our postman is nosey about the mail :-) Ignore her reading postmarks or taking guesses at handwriting. Just smile. If she OPENS your mail, that is different and you have to tell her, politely but firmly, not to. If she breaths down your neck reading it, move out of her way, and keep moving.

    If she watches you using the internet you need a laptop you can take somewhere private. Put a password on it and make a habit od deleting your brousing history.

    Talking of private, your bedroom should be your own private space. Try the nice way first. Assuming you don't already, start cleaning it, regularly and noisily (vacuum cleaner), change your bedding slightly more often that she does... either yours if she normally would, or her own, put it through the wash and drier... if you don't like ironing put it back on the bed warm and drape a throw over it. Same with your clothes... do your own laundry.

    That should fix her because it leaves her no excuse to come in. If she does, tell her you don't need anything doing, thank you, and you're busy... homework... wprk-work... whatever fits.

    The final resort is a bolt on the door, and I do mean final, That could cause a major row, but they're not hard to fix. Ask the guy in the DIY store if you need advice... and be perpared to spend time explaining WHY you've fixed it... you need somewhere to work... Mothers like the word work. Also keep in mind it won't stop her poking about while you're out... unless you live in an old house with locks & you have the only key. Make sure there's nothing of interest left in there, however heavy the rucksack you have to carry around for a while. There's nothing like boredom for turning off nosey... she'll probably start watching the neighbours instead of you.

    The other eternal question is "where are you going", followed by "who with". Is there any reason not to tell her before she asks? "Popping out for a bit to meet X. We might go to Y... I'll ring if I decide to sleepover." AND GO... QUICKLY, but do remember to ring if you're going to be what you know she thinks is late, or you do "sleepover". Her worries are REAL, & daren1 is right she's nosey because she cares.

    One last thing... when did you last buy her flowers? When did you last say "I love you"???
    Colleen

    Moderator
    Wow, I usually agree with you suliz but I can not agree with any of this. This is a classic list for if you want a convict for a child. Parents have a God given and government given right to know what their kids are up to every second! This is good advice for a child of legal age earning his/her own way in life but NOT for a dependent child.
    Colleen

    Moderator
    My nephew password protected his laptop. His mother threw it away. Good on her.
    suliz

    If you think this is a child under 18 I agree with you, Colleen.

    That was not my impression... I thought very likely more like 20 and lacking in confidence.

    You are far more used to making this judgement than I am... advice retracted... I wouldn't stand for a youngster surfing the internet without parental controls either.
    mom

    LOL...no disrespect suliz...but if my kids felt it was alright to bolt their doors in my home, they would come home to find the door completely dismounted from the wall.Years ago the door slamming was an issue so I did take the door off for a few days...no more slamming and more respect for the home they are blessed to live in. I'm not an angry mom but I certainly shoot from the hip and have boundries as well
    suliz

    Boundaries are vital.

    Please see my new answer.

    Colleen

    Moderator
    I was really surprised at what you wrote suliz, lol it was so out of character for you. I should have realized you were speaking from the perspective of an adult having these issues.
    sounds almost like your guilty of somthing,from my experience most moms are nosey,perhaps if she wasn't so cocerned or nosey it would mean she didn't care, its their job. if its really a problem be gentile about it and break it to her lightly
    All young people think their mums are nosey. But when you have kids, they'll say the same thing about you! You are lucky your mum cares about you.
    A headache works. She probably used it.
    "mom, you're so nosy you're driving me nuts!" say it with a smile and laugh a little.
    Should you tell your mom that she is nosey? NO!
    It would however, be a great idea to have a heart-to-heart talk with her about your privacy. If you are living in her home, you must also respect the house rules.
    First off I would need to know if you are over 21 and if you are living on your own or under her roof with her providing for you? Barring that, then I would just try to ignore or say in a nice way that my life is my life and let's talk about something else .....But yes you should be glad that someone in your life cares what is going on in your life.
    My kids outright tell me I'm nosey all the time. I have backed off a bit but at the same time I am doing it because of the obvious first...I love them and want to know whats "goin down" with them. Second, you must realize that as our children we are responsible for you and everything you do until your 18. So if you go destroy something because your bored, your parent is the one to pay for it. Look at it this way. When you hear about a shooting in a school, and it comes out the kid was online writing about this plan, people immediately ask why the parent wasn't once in awhile looking into what he/she was up to, and the parent is condemned for not being nosey. I know thats a huge example but let me tell you it's a pain in my arce to have to listen to the complaining when I ask, but they are worth it to me. I also have to say sometimes I ask because I am genuinely just interested in who my kids are, I quite like them as individuals so it is out of interest, not being nosey.I have to say you could have a parent that beats the living daylights out of you and didn't care if you even existed. I know you probably hear that and are sick of hearing but there it is.
    If you were my kid, you're grounded, no Internet and phone.
    My mom is nosy,she knows it,it's her personality,and unfortunately I have inherited it because I'm a pretty nosy mom now to.:)
    Tell her as tactfully as you can you want some privacy.Wish i had told my mum when I was young as she still wants to know everything and i am 51 so nip it in the bud now.

    unfortunately until you are 16 years of age and living under the same roof as your mum there are rules you need to abide by. Explain that you need your own privacy to her in a grown up and calm approach.



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