Should I look him in the one good eye? What would you do in the same situation?

    The local veterinarian has only one good eye (as far as I can tell/SEE).


      His right eye looks normal, but his left eye is more than halfway closed with a bit of eyelid skin dangling between his upper and lower left eye. 


       (I don't know what happened to his eye but it's irrelevant.  I can only guess that he may have been attacked by a dog/cat/animal).


      When I have face to face encounters with him, I try my best to either look directly into his right eye or at the bridge of his nose.


     However, I can not maintain focus on either and I find my own eyes (like a magnet) wandering over and staring at his dangly bit. 


       This makes me very uncomfortable because I think he may notice from his good eye that I'm staring at his bad eye.


    What would you do in this same situation?  Would you look at the person in his/her one good eye or focus your gaze between both eyes?


    Do you think the person would notice?



    +7  Views: 795 Answers: 4 Posted: 4 years ago

    4 Answers

    I think I would concentrate on the good eye. Keep in mind, this person with a physical impairment, is quite used to people staring. If you even make the smallest attempt not to stare, you are probably doing better than most.


    I see eye to eye with you.

    country bumpkin

    I'm in agreement with you Ducky.
    West-bus, since you have obviously seen my question (because you took the time to comment to Ducky) why not take the time to also answer my question.

    @ cb
    Yes cb, I not only read your Question, I duly rewarded it with a TU of which you obviously overlooked and it was and is my intention to reply to it in due course.
    My visits to this Forum this year has been in dribs and drabs due primarily to enforced stays in hospital with the likelihood of more to come. Be patient.

    Sorry to hear you are ill west-bus. Being in the hospital, especially multiple times, is not a great way to spend time. Get well soon.
    country bumpkin

    I didn't overlook anything. I made the observation that since you had the time to make a comment to a member, why you didn't take the time to answer the question too. I would have liked to have seen your answer. Plain and simple.

    Sorry to hear that you are not well.
    Feel better soon.

    ....focus on the good eye since the other eye is damaged 

    ....treat him like you would want to be treated are strong and smart enough to make a difference 

    country bumpkin

    I do my best to look him directly in the eyes as I do with everyone else I'm carrying on a conversation.
    I'm bothered because I do know better than to stare at someone with a physical disability (vision impaired).
    Gee, he must notice that I'm having trouble focusing on his one good eye. If this makes me so uncomfortable, I can not help but be concerned about how this makes him feel.

    Today, I saw a group of deaf women signing to one another while standing in line to purchase groceries. I wrote down on a piece of paper asking her what are the best websites to practice learning basic sign language. The lady whom I gave the note to wrote down a couple of websites.

    I would wear sunglasses or clip-on lenses, dark enough so it's difficult to see your pupils. I especially like to wear them when I'm out, even indoors. Staring at someone can incite an altercation. I sometimes take the NYC subway, and I'm a bit uneasy about it. When I get into a subway car, I'll scan it for potential trouble. When I'm standing or sitting, I'll do the same. I'll "lock in" to someone if I'm suspicious. I've never been asked, "What are you looking at?" A few years ago, my suspicions proved correct. A group of teenagers got onboard, at 11 a.m. during a weekday. I thought that they should be in school, and were up to no good. They went to the other end of the car. I got off about 20 minutes later, and my suspicion proved to be correct. Right after I left, people were running out of the car. I looked through a window and saw the group pummeling someone on the floor. The cops were on the scene in seconds, and were rounding up suspects.  



    A person wearing sunglasses indoors, makes ME suspicious! They are usually up to no good. :)

    @Ducky: You might be onto something. I'm wearing them as I type this. LOL!

    Proving my point. :)
    country bumpkin

    I don't intentionally stare at him. I look him straight in the eyes just as I do everyone else when I'm carrying on a conversation. I don't mean to drift over and stare at his bad eye, it just happens.

    CB,it would not be the first time he has come across the problem,,i have come across a similiar situation,,i find if i ask the person how they ended up that way,,they will either tell you to mind your own business,or happily tell you their story,,if they tell you their story their eye would no longer be a facination to you..>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<..

    country bumpkin

    I understand what you are saying, Terry.
    However, I feel that asking him what happened to his eye may make the situation more awkward.

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