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    You've lost all use of your dominant side, ie; arm, leg, foot, hand, balance.....

    Recovery is possible but a lot of hard work. What do you do? 

    +6  Views: 904 Answers: 5 Posted: 1 year ago
    Bob/PKB

    Threats don't work on anyone, not even many children. You're possibly torn between obligation, sadness for him, and a sense of indignation. Perhaps a printed list of "You do" and "I help with" can clean some fuzzy lines. If you can stick to the list, he has no choice.AND, he's responsible for the consequences of his inaction. It may be like laying down the law to a spoiled brat, and you may want to give in, but that makes YOU culpable. C'mon, JHH, the metamorphosis starts with you.

    5 Answers

    This sounds like a person in your home so I would quit waiting on him . I know that might be hard to do but enabling him DOES NOT work! Good Luck,Julie

    jhharlan

    Threats don't work either. As if I could threaten him.....

    ....consult doctor and therapist 

    jhharlan

    Lovely. Trust me, a therapist would be most welcomed and he would respond TO THEM. The doctor has given up, it's up to the patient first and foremost. He does what I ask but nothing more. He likes being waited on. Besides, progress might hurt.....

    I would do the hard work. With my mind intact, I would wallow in self pity, but, with a good support team and light at the end of the tunnel, I gotta try.


    Philippians 4:13

    go to E R . Sounds like a stroke.

    jhharlan

    You keep up so well.....
    It WAS a stroke two and a half year's ago.
    mycatsmom

    don't get sarcastic
    Ducky

    Moderator
    LOL!!
    jhharlan

    Trust me, I wasn't being sarcastic. Semantics
    Ducky

    Moderator
    LOL!!

    Anything worth doing is never easy,and God helps those who help themselves,,which means if he does not take a step first,he will not take any steps..i do not think this will help you JH, but it is all i got apart from manually moving him..>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<..

    jhharlan

    I’ve taken all his sweets (he loves sweets) away. Will trade them for exercise. He just goes without. I say if I go on vacation, who can take care of him when he can’t do s**t for himself. Nobody. And I will take vacation. The last time I did, he never got out of bed and was so dehydrated he couldn’t pee. I’m down to threats and shaming. I’m tired.
    country bumpkin

    Moderator
    Julie, do you not work for a company? I've heard you call yourself his caregiver. My mom has caregivers who come to assist her for several hours every day and then leave

    I suppose you are working independently because if you're working for a company someone else would be hired to take your place while you are vacationing.

    Does David have insurance? Why not hire someone from a company like Girling or Nurses Unlimited to take care of him while you're away?

    It seems like it would do you both some good to have a break from each other.
    jhharlan

    David was my very best friend once. I was watching him while he was bed ridden for his wife who found out she had cancer and died nine days later. I was there and he had no other help from family or friends. I moved in and don’t pay rent. I handle all financial matters and he can afford to go no where. I can’t leave him to die.....
    terryfossil 1

    JH..maybe your now his best friend..now and again in life,things do go full circle..>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<..
    jhharlan

    Yes. He has no friends. I’ve been here three years and he’s had not a single visitor that wasn’t medical. A brother he sees once or twice a year. Maybe. And his mother still lives and he sees her once or twice a year. That’s it. It’s not a moneyed family.


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