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    If you could step back in time.......

    what advice would you have for your younger self? (any age) 

    +7  Views: 1161 Answers: 8 Posted: 5 years ago
    mycatsmom

    Sounds like that song from Cher, ".......if I could turn back time .........."
    lindilou

    Great question Colleen ... really got me thinking about 'turning points' in life and yes MCM it does remind of that beautiful song by Cher >>> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsKbwR7WXN4
    mycatsmom

    Thanks for putting that song on here, Lindi, and welcome back .

    8 Answers

    I'd practically redo everything. .......and differently .

    Colleen

    Moderator
    The question is, what advice would you give to your younger self. Do you think she would listen to your advice if you could go back and talk to her?
    mycatsmom

    If it was me talking to me,then Yes. I'd listen to me, but nobody else. I would take into consideration what they said, tho' . The advice I would give to my younger self is too numerous to mention .

    I would go back to my school days, so that I could work harder than I did, and then get a decent  job with a decent  pension  at the end of it.

    Colleen

    Moderator
    Remember, it won't be "you" now, you would have to convince your younger self. Do you think you could do that?
    sunnyB

    I do my best to convince younger people about the importance of working at getting a decent job. So hopefully I would be able to convince a young version of myself. The trouble is when I was young I thought I knew best, which I now know wasn't the case.
    Colleen

    Moderator
    Which is why I asked. I remember my young self and am not sure I would listen to an older version of myself. ;)

    Take more care of my body and my money, simple as that, other than that I have no regrets.

    Advice: to start "knowing" early. Don't waste time.  Trust fewer.....

    Colleen, that is a banger of a question,,some people would give themselves 3 or 4 bits of advice,,me ,i think i could give myself 10 pages of advice,,but i will land a few basic and important ones,,1.learn to control anger,find a reason for life as early as possible, Start my financial future as early as possible..learn to forgive..>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<....

    I would have advised myself to go tell my father about my mother's abuses toward me ... I could have convinced myself that he would listen to my truth and not her lies....and that he would have been aware of how much I truly needed him as an advocate. As a kid I was living in fear of imagined outcomes during a time when no-one listened to the kid's side. I was beaten by her so badly that the injuries to my skull and jaw ended up torturing me to this day. I would have sued but she would have been charged and my 5 siblings [whom she never berated or abused] would have been placed in foster care and I would have been hated by all .... you see, my father left her and I was a daddy's girl, a constant reminder to her ... of him. I left home at age 13. I moved in with my Dad at age 17.... the four years in between were like a nightmare a lot of the time.... I never ever told my father about what mother did to me ... I held that secret from him out of concern for the guilt and anger he would have felt... so you see the burden that a child carries from being abused ... yes Colleen, I would have convinced my little girl self to go to Daddy and tell on Mom.


    Image result for abuse runs deep

    Colleen

    Moderator
    Thank you for sharing Lindi. I know it's hard to put your story out there but it's good at the same time. Someone may stumble across your words someday and learn from them. I'm sure that is your hope too. xx
    mycatsmom

    Sorry Lindi. Hope you don't mind me saying that your mother sounds psychotic. Or was she a heavy drinker ? Where did you go at 13 ?
    nomdeplume

    What a dreadful story, but at least you had a father's love to see you through. When you were a child could you not have told a teacher or doctor about the abuse?
    lindilou

    Colleen .. that is my hope ... things have changed a lot for abuse victims so we are getting better at hearing victims, especially kids. We, as kids, were supposed to be seen and not heard ...
    MCM , yes my mother was not only a bit psycho but she was also really angry about being left with 6 kids and although my dad paid HUGE child support... it did nothing to alleviate it. She has never been a drinker. I ended up lieing about my age and headed up to the tarsands and got a job cooking at a big hotel in Ft. Macmurray ... which I can say in hindsight is no place for a little girl.
    Nomdeplume.... no-one regarded a child's truth when I was a kid .. if I had told anyone at school .. all h3ll would've broken loose at my mother's house. She didn't take kindly to anyone knowing our 'business' ...
    nomdeplume

    Sadly kids and even parents are not listened to and in the UK there have been cases where children were abused and police and child protection authorities did nothing in order to avoid allegations of racism. This happened in Rochdale and Oxford and possibly also among politicians and other well-known people. Investigations continue but files have been 'lost'.

    Don't get married. don't have kids.

    The advice I'd give my younger self is the advice I wish had been given to me:


    TURN OFF THE TV.
    GO OUTSIDE AND PLAY.
    DO YOUR BEST IN SCHOOL.
    BE INVOLVED IN YOUR COMMUNITY.
    EMBRACE YOUR FAITH.
    WHEN OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS, ANSWER. IF IT PASSES YOU BY, MAKE YOUR OWN.



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