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    Some kids are bullies. Some people are bullies. What makes them act that way. Why do they feel good when they hurt other people?

    bullies

    +7  Views: 813 Answers: 11 Posted: 4 years ago

    11 Answers

    I am 67 and I was bullied when I was maybe 9 years old! I never said any thing to anyone! I just wanted to (fit in)  I wanted those kids to like me!   I more or less Kissed Butt!  All parents should question their children about intimidation at school  Please everyone Take heed ! There has been so many sad stories concerning bullies!   If you are Bullied-- Tell someone! PLEASE!!!

    itsmee

    Good saying, clu.

    When i was in Primary School, we had the proverbial bully who always picked on someone smaller than himself, i later found out his father tomented and bullied him at home for years. he was taking his frustrations out on the kids at school. In his later teens he eventually left home, he became a changed person, you couldn't find a better helpful guy. My personnel conclusion like a lot of things, 'Bullying' start in the home enviroment.

    sunnyB

    I think you are right buletman, I knew someone like that years ago when I was in school. They came from a broken home , but they changed as they got into their teenage years too, I think is often an underlying reason for this.

    When I was growing up in a rough poor section of South Providence, RI, I taught a Bully a lesson once.  You see he was a gorilla of a guy, in middle school, most of us were about 100 lbs. ave.  He must have been closer to 170 lb.  He would come up from behind you and do a WWF move called "coco-bopp" which was to slam his head against the back of yours.  I think I have already mentioned the size and power of this goon.  He would then order you to give up any candy or gum that you had.  I laid waiting for him to approach, and had a pack of "feen-o-mint" (a laxative that looked exactly like Chicklets gum).  I swapped packages, and chewed the Chicklets each morning on the way to school, to get his attention.  I finally got a bite, as he approached, I was ready, and to avoid the "bopp", I gave him the pack!  Guess who was dismissed early that day for having "a bowel problem"?  It was priceless, and all of the other victims were ecstatic!  True story, although today, I would be sent to a reform school for trying to push drugs!  

    mycatsmom

    good one, bustie.
    itsmee

    Wonderful idea. Could it be passed on to kids? I'm thinking ... I'm thinking. I wish we could get a principal's feed in.
    You know, if the kid who was bullied was merely "carrying his meds" What could be the problem?

    I believe Bullies are mentally ill. I am 75 years old and have been bullied excessively by bully neighbors. They throw rocks at me, they poisoned my dog, they shot my outside lights out and tore my fence up. They then came into my yard and sprayed all my roses with weed killer. Killing beautiful roses that I had planted 30 years ago. The police refuse to do anything to them. So bullies are born when the authorities protect them. I live in Brookfield il. Bullies are mentally ill.

    clu

    What a terrible story! I am ashamed to be a human when I hear this kind of story! I am sorry you have had to suffer like this! I only hope that what you sow --you shall reap! Bless you!
    hector5559

    You must get someone to help you ,if the above is true,If its in the uk lets know what county you are in,
    Clonge

    Where do you live?
    itsmee

    I am sorry this is happening to you. Do you have some kind of proof? Bullies usually hide their "crimes." Could you phone your local newspaper and speak to the editor. You really couldn't send a letter to the editor at this point because you will need proof.
    But now I'm thinking ... If things don't go right the bullies will act more agressively.
    Talk to your other neighbors. See if any of them have had problems. Is there anything you can think of that could have caused these people to get so horrible, agressive, and bully.
    I'm still thinking of you calling the newspaper ... if you got the right reporter, something might be done.
    I hope you'll stay on this site. Maybe someone will come up with an idea. If not, it's just good to have you here.
    P.S. I read your story to my husband. He strongly cautioned you not to anger these mentally ill people any more. Stay quiet. Be careful. He thinks you should move. There must be some organization in your area that could help you.
    sunnyB

    You need someone to help you for sure, don't you have any family who can help ? a friend or other neighbour. You shouldn't have to put up with this sort of thing, Why don't you go to someone high up in the police, their job is to protect people where ever you are. Stay on this site you will gain many friends here.
    lindilou

    Clonge, she/he is in Brookefield Illinois which looks like a beautiful place to be.
    Now...my advise is to pray/wish them away and imagine encompassing them with white, whitest light....they should be moving along very soon after your doing this....however, you must cease from thinking on them and the behaviour...just keep pouring white light on them and as others have said...avoid encounters diligently even in thought. Once they disperse...plant some more roses and go round getting cuttings of beautiful plants indigenous to your area! peace LL
    Tommyh

    Get some help.keep calling the police.keep knocking on the door until someone lets you in.DON'T put up with it.Don't get mad,get even.Good luck.
    itsmee

    Tommy ~ I didn't even think of the police. I don't think they'd respond in the U.S. I could say more ... : x
    You're right about "keep knocking"
    Tommyh

    Neighbourhood squabbles are the hardest for them to sort out.Evertbody keeps pointing the finger at "Who started it" & that's the last thing they are concerned about.(The police).The point is if someone has committed a crime it should not go unnoticed to the police
    itsmee

    I agree with you tommy. I hope that optima reports the crimes (has them documented) If the police don't actually go after the bullies at least the police will be informed if something worse happens.
    Well, what could be worse than poisoning a dog? Or throwing rocks at a senior citizen? Those are frank crimes.
    As I said, my worry is retaliation.

    Bullies must be pulled out in public at every opportunity so they are educated as to how the bullying behaviours are unacceptable in this society. Bullies are often ignorant narcissists but sometimes are being bullied themselves which leads to extreme low self esteem which leads to a myriad of dysfunctional behaviours. In the case of narcissists however you will be hard pressed to even extract a semblance of remorse or apology for bullying behaviour. A narcissist would say...."I'm sorry you can't handle my actions....perhaps you have a problem and not me" or some such imaginary justification.


    It is not against the law to be a butthole....but when behaviours become damaging to others, or threatening to others...something must be done about it immediately. I find that prayers and what I call "white-lighting" a bully works so well that often a 'bully' will move far away in an attempt to get away from all that 'feel-good' vibe that 'white-lighting' someone evil will impart. It is simply my experience.    peace itsmee and if somebody is bullying you...smash them with white light!

    I think it is often something that happens in a persons childhood which makes them bullies, there were bullies when I was a kid, and there still are, now it's not only kids in school but adults on the internet. Of cause the best thing is to stand up to them, especially when they are on their own, most bullies have to have other people around them to make them look big, confront them when they are alone and they are not so clever.

    itsmee

    At age 75, one loses some of their POW POW WHAP. But ... still it's a good idea if the size and ages are correct for a battle.

    It's been tried on me without success.Never pick on a man who wears a tool belt.

    There is always a question about how to approprately deal with a bully…there are so many. Bullies are convinced that extortion works to their benefit.


    extortionist |ik?stôrSH?nist|
    noun
    a person who tries to obtain something through force or violence; a racketeer: he is a blackmailer and an extortionist.


    The discovery that such a method works to their benefit assures its contenued use in every culture. Shaming in a publicly displayed spectacle of ridicule for such behavior can be  an appropriate and meaningful correction for such errant behavior. History dealt with bullies more harshly than they are today but a revival of those methods would be less effective today. We just don’t impose lashings with horse whips like so many were before our present time. And public ridicule doesn’t have the sting it once did. Beating bullies can draw problems with firearms. I deal with bullies the best way I know how. I offer my witness to God. If you had any idea what I have seen come of this method you would have no question about what is an appropriate way to handle it. Offer the problem to God and stand back. It is not your problem. The bully has a problem that is about to change their life…and thank you for offering the “problem” to where it can be properly dealt with.  

    Bullies act the way they do because they are making  up for something - a complex. under supervision, this behaviour can be corrected but they must show willingness to change. Hurting someone makes them happy. Keep in mind bullies are generally very lonely people individually and shun by society. The need help. 

    itsmee

    Interesting comments. When I see bullies in movies, they usually have their pals behind them as back ups. I hate bullies. I don't think I'd be capable of helping them to change their behaviors.
    sawali

    I did not mean help from you and nd me. I mean professional help.

    Good observations from everyone.  
    The MSBSCW who is the mother of my grandchildren is a bully from way back in elementary school when she threw things at, pulled the hair of, and verbally abused one of her classmates, who is a good friend of mine (along with the rest of her family).  No reason for it, just a truly nasty person. 

    hi just a few thoughts, I have been bullied and beaten up, badly by  them, and in turn I must be honest I too have bullied others in my very distant past, I think that it all stems from a very high sense of insecurity, which is why you almost never see them act this way alone, they need the gangs, so to speak approval to make them selves feel good, and the few times I did it , I soon realized it was my insecurities and my issues that made me act out, now believe me it is not easy to admit that I did bully some people but it is the truth, I soon grew out of it, and it didn't take me long to realize I was simply doing it to get back at people for it being done to me, now this is absolutely crazy thinking, for it wasn't anyone's fault but the person who was bulling me, not anyone else's, so I  just didn't do it, a lot comes with age and maturity, as well as being self aware of our own actions, in fact I turned it all the way around to become the person who would step in whenever I saw someone get bullied by anyone , it just made me feel sick to my stomach and the only thing worse is not doing anything at all and to let it simply happen. now as a side note , I see many people say use white light and prayer and those things, and while I am sure that is what u believe in, and maybe it actually worked for you, but I  can guarantee you that it will not work in all places, and that the only thing bullies truly understand is either waling away from them , or dealing with them head on in private away from there friends, but whatever one believes is just fine, but if it was just a simple matter of prayer and white light then no one would have cancer and little children wouldn't be starving to death by the tens of thousands every day, as I can most assuredly tell you that they are not asking for their lot in life and that they are probably praying with all their might , yet nothing seems to fix their problem, as well I also agree with tommyh there, yuppers don't mess with a guy in a tool belt, lol


     

    pythonlover

    Moderator
    Well said jonot7.Welcome to akaQA.


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