Bob/PKB
Do you think my 32 year old nephew should take time from his senior year at chiropractic college (on campus from 7 AM to 7 PM Monday through Friday) to visit with his grandmother. She has many health issues (dialysis, bypass, pacemaker, atrial fibrillation, congestive heart failure, macular degeneration, recently fell and broke her femur near the hip). At almost 95, this latest catastrophe has taken a huge toll on her, and she is unable to swallow and is not quite as cognizant as she was ten days ago.
He was here a couple of weeks ago and enjoyed a pleasant and leisurely breakfast with her, his mom, stepdad, his three cousins, and me. The memory of his grandmother then is certainly NOT what he would have if he were to take time off school. I have no idea how he would make up the lost time. The college is very intense and demanding. Less than half who begin the 4 year program finish. He's doing very well.
ME? I would like him to call and talk to her for a couple of minutes, just so she can hear his voice. Keeping a pleasant memory of her sounds like a good idea to me.
I don't really know if she is thinking about him at all...she asks for my sister, my sons (particularly the middle one), and me. We are "here". My nephew is 3 hours away.
5 Answers
Ducky
I think that a telephone call would be a reasonable compromise. If he is involved in a course of such intensity, taking time off could be the difference between making it or not. She has lots of support from people who are more able to be with her. Under the circumstances, he should be excused I believe.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 10 | |
Tommyh
sunnyB
I think you have the answer Bob, He dosn't need to take more time out to visit, if he spent time with her a few weeks ago , that is his best memory to have, and if she is not able to be sure who he is, that would make him feel worse. So I think as you say a phone call would be the best idea.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
terryfossil 1
hi BOB,,i agree with everybody and i disagree with everybody,,now thats what i call sitten on the fence,, however i do not say what i say without some down to earth knowledge...if i was the 95 year old,i would tell him to make the phone call,,,and if he came down to see me, i would tell him he is being silly..BUT.......i would be very proud of him,,and i would look upon him as a MAN with a lot of moral fibre...and sometimes moral fibre outweighs common sense,,,,,always glad to put my threepence worth in,,,,,
| 10 years ago. Rating: 5 | |
robertgrist
From personal experience my dead friends are doing much better than when they were dying. I have learned not to put time to visit toward the dying any more than necessary. Clinging relatives are often resented after the fact for prolonging their stay here and no one wants to be remembered on their deathbeds. That always ticked me off. I like folk who remember my more charming and fun loving moments. How would you like to be remembered as that fevered dying child? We all have that somewhere. So show some respect and let the dying die.
| 10 years ago. Rating: 4 | |
