15 Answers

We have been down this road countless times in the few short months that I have been here.  You are opening a can of worms, but it's your lunch....

MY PERSONAL OPINION (and I am a Christian) IS:   If you have any insight to the Bible, you know that God wants a personal relationship with you .  He doesn't FORCE you to know Him.  You have the freedom of choosing what you think, feel, and do.  There is no omnipotent God pulling invisible strings on you, making you do anything.  It's all up to you.
And it's no different with anyone else.  FREEDOM TO CHOOSE WHAT PATHS THEIR LIVES WILL TAKE.  NO INTERFERENCE FROM GOD.  YOU WANT GOD.  YOU CHOOSE GOD.  
Since God isn't controlling every move we make, stuff is gonna happen that we aren't gonna like.   Wars, drive-bys, muggings, home invasions, drug addiction, murders, arson, DUI, etc.

But what about tidal waves and hurricanes, you may ask.  I don't know how the weather works, but I doubt God is looking around trying to decide who to smite with a tornado.  I think humans have had a hand in mucking around with weather, too.  Correct me if you know better, cuz I 'm just suspicious.

SO , in conclusion, I believe that God IS real AND powerful AND loving.  All the BAD things happen EVERY day and OUTWEIGH the miracles because God's NOT directing traffic. 

Your anger over the senseless murder of your brother and this lady is justified and understandable. Please don't blame God for the actions of evil people. As Bob/PKB says, God offers his love but doesn't force it upon anyone. I am sorry for your loss.

I have to add here that we tend to watch the news and read the papers and if you notice they tend to look for the bad things and capitalize on them. Even most television shows capitalize on violence as it oddly gets our attention. There are many things happening daily that could and are considered miracles but it's just not put out there like the negative stuff. I support your anger in this situation and have no right to tell you how you should feel but, your anger will eat you up. We are not puppets of God that He pulls the strings for His entertainment. We have free will and choices to make daily. In the name and love for your brother, I can see your anger towards violence. Maybe become an advocate for the men and women that are being threatend by their ex's.Find a way to heal through helping those in the same type of situation. I am so sorry for your loss. 

Question: "Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people?"

Answer: This is one of the most difficult questions in all of theology. God is eternal, infinite, omniscient, omnipresent, and omnipotent. Why should human beings (not eternal, infinite, omniscient, omnipresent, or omnipotent) expect to be able to fully understand God’s ways? The book of Job deals with this issue. God had allowed Satan to do everything he wanted to Job except kill him. What was Job’s reaction? “Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him” (Job 13:15). “The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised” (Job 1:21). Job did not understand why God had allowed the things He did, but he knew God was good and therefore continued to trust in Him. Ultimately, that should be our reaction as well.

Why do bad things happen to good people? The biblical answer is there are no “good” people. The Bible makes it abundantly clear that all of us are tainted by and infected with sin (Ecclesiastes 7:20; Romans 3:23; 1 John 1:8). Romans 3:10-18 could not be clearer about the non-existence of “good” people: “There is no one righteous, not even one; there is no one who understands, no one who seeks God. All have turned away, they have together become worthless; there is no one who does good, not even one. Their throats are open graves; their tongues practice deceit. The poison of vipers is on their lips. Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness. Their feet are swift to shed blood; ruin and misery mark their ways, and the way of peace they do not know. There is no fear of God before their eyes.” Every human being on this planet deserves to be thrown into hell at this very moment. Every second we spend alive is only by the grace and mercy of God. Even the most terrible misery we could experience on this planet is merciful compared to what we deserve, eternal hell in the lake of fire.

A better question would be “Why does God allow good things to happen to bad people?” Romans 5:8 declares, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Despite the evil, wicked, sinful nature of the people of this world, God still loves us. He loved us enough to die to take the penalty for our sins (Romans 6:23). If we receive Jesus Christ as Savior (John 3:16; Romans 10:9), we will be forgiven and promised an eternal home in heaven (Romans 8:1). What we deserve is hell. What we are given is eternal life in heaven if we come to Christ in faith.

Yes, sometimes bad things happen to people who seem undeserving of them. But God allows things to happen for His reasons, whether or not we understand them. Above all, however, we must remember that God is good, just, loving, and merciful. Often things happen to us that we simply cannot understand. However, instead of doubting God's goodness, our reaction should be to trust Him. ”Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Recommended Resource: Wrestling with God: How Can I Love a God I'm Not Sure I Trust? by James Denison.

God set up the law of physics to protect us. So, it you fly a plane, it can go down , b/c of gravity. God invented fire to keep us warm and so we can cook.But, if  you or your child get too near to it ,or stick  your hand in it, you will get burned.  ......the same with water, etc.  He can't undo the law of physics for everyone every minute of the day, or there would be chaos.

Note:  Please do not TU or Thank this answer. TD if you feel the need. TY

Been giving more thought to your question and the circumstances surrounding it.  I can't begin to imagine the heartbreak and loss you are suffering; this has never happened to me.  Were I to suffer a traumatic loss (and I expect it will happen; why isn't relevant), I am pretty sure I would be devastated and immobilized, but I know that I wouldn't be cursing God.  My comfort would be found there.  My dad went into cardiac arrest during heart surgery back in 1993. I ran to the chapel and prayed.  I'm not the most "sold out" Christian, either, but He is where I go. I keep in touch with Him throughout the day.  My weak faith keeps me going.

You will find people here to support your anger and distaste for God and others who will support faith in God and insist you will find comfort in Him.   At this point in your grief, I would encourage you to seek some serious grief counseling.  You have a huge responsibility to your niece and nephew.  The influence you have on how they grow and the people they become is partly on you. Kids aren't stupid; what they lack in experience they make up for with "intuition"......your words aren't ringing true with them.  

You may want to actually tell them the truth....A man was so mad that his ex-wife liked their dad and went on a date to dinner with him that he got a gun and shot the lady, their dad, and then himself.  He left them without their dad and his own little girl an orphan.  Crying with them is OK.  It can be a way of learning to deal with disappointment, anger, and loss. One of them may become a grief counselor and help countless people as an adult.  What a fine tribute to your brother (and you) that would be. 

IF your brother hadn't asked her out, IF she hadn't gone out with him, IF that guy hadn't been so full of pride..... they all made choices.  If you believe what is written in the New Testament, you know God didn't orchestrate the outcome.   I've been angry about my circumstances and expressed that anger to God.  But I can't just blame Him for those circumstances and stop believing in Him because I don't get what I want or something bad happens to people I love, or to me.  I believe He wants good stuff for me.  

You be pissed on your own time, but don't do that to your brother's children.  Please get some counseling for yourself.  The anger will eat you alive.   

I think I hear what you are saying Randy0922. You are not angry at God. You are angry at the words coming at you saying it was God's will. You are angry at the ones who, in your mind, are making God out to be a murderer as evident by the words given to you that, "god had plans for there daddy. " along with your own words, " The man with the gun might as well been the almighty protecter him self, no way would any god of mine let this happen." You believe God is love and God does not kill. You are correct. Man kills but they do so out of the free will that God gives everyone. Free will means just that, free will. God does not step in and get involved. This man who murdered your bother, his girlfriend and then killed himself will be accountable for his actions. Your bother and his girlfriend are together and exist in God's light and love. I believe they would want you to forgive and to put forth God's love rather than live in hurt and anger. Believe in God in your own way which I hope includes the belief that God will handle and take care of what needs to be taken care of.  Accept God or deny God in your own way. This is your free will and no one can ever tell you that you are wrong.  You must find your own way to heal. I trust that some day you will be able to do that. This is the best I can offer you in your time of grief. Peace be with you. 

Some people believe that natural disasters like earthquakes, tsunamis, volcanic eruptions are due to Adam's sin in the Garden of Eden. Some people are crazy.

I am very very sorry for all this that has happened to you and your family.  You will go through being very angry and have every right to be angry.  I do not know any right words to make your pain and that of those children go away.  I wish I did.  Please accept my sincere condolences for this horrific tragedy.  No one can tell you they know how you feel they have not walked a mile in your shoes.  I wish I could wish your hurt, pain, anger and all that you are going through away for I would do it if I could.  I wish for you and those children someone to come into your life that perhaps can offer comfort and empathy not throwing hurtful words at you.  Please know that I care I truly do.

I am very sorry for your tragedy. I know I would be angry also.God has broad shoulders. He can take you being angry with him. Please get some therapy for yourself and the children. Maybe you can find some peace. Please accept my sincere sympathy

Natural occurances are just the earth readjusting itself. Like a volcano is the earth burping or throwing up. A earthquake is the earth stretching so it won't tear or break in two. Just don't live near these areas.

I've had a life of bad things happen to me, nothing as bad as you talked about, but each time I came closer to God and living for Him made things better and it can for you to but it will take time and lots of prayer, keep the faith and good can come from this too, God bless.

Because we are to learn from our own mistakes and grow and mature from them,  just as a good parent does for the child they love.  Trouble is, we don't grow and learn because of our selfishness, so we make life on this earth very difficult for ourselves because we choose not to see beyond pleasures, or bad habits, etc.