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    Separation and Divorce....2011.

    I have been separated now for over a year, more like 15 months now....I am heading for the Divorce court soon with papers, my ex-husband and I have yet to settle....but now, after spending some time with him over this weekend just gone, (March 4-5th 2011) I don't feel the pangs of love again, just a high admiration for him, he, the ex-husband picked up the tab for the boat ride we had today, all the food we ate, picked up food for my Mum and everything....opened the door to the car so I could get in etc....he has been behaving this way for the last 6 months....My Mum said Diane, be clear on this that you actually want a Divorce, because once it's done, he will not contact you, and Anthony has made it abundantly clear he will not communicate with me after the Divorce....My question is should I go to counselling and say the same thing and see what she says or just go with my initial decision and sign the papers for Divorce....I'm a little perplexed tonight to say the least...he never used to be this kind, really pompous and pious to say the least, but these days he has softened alot....I would appreciate some genuine feedback or answers to my question please....if you can...that would be great...cheers from Diane. (San Remo, Australia)

    0  Views: 686 Answers: 6 Posted: 13 years ago

    6 Answers

    I would stick with your original decision to devorce him. After all the marriage got so bad that it led to seperation and pending devorce. His new behavour is only to make you wonder what you might be missing. If you were to reconcile he would go back to the same man that you new before. And in your own words that is... pompous. My guess is that he is feeling insecure about his future without you. Don't fall for it.

    Diane3925

    Thanks for your great comment....Yes you are probably right, but I am going to take my time Divorcing this man for the 2nd time...I just don't want to rush into anything like Divorce and then cry later....I will heed your advice though, I kinda know this in my mind and heart anyway...thanks again for your time. From Diane.

    Diane, ask yourself this question: What was your "ex" doing over 15 months ago? Now that it's time to go to go court, your "ex" shows up and want to wine and dine you. My opinion, your "ex" is playing games. Your "ex" had 15 months to win you over, and he waited until the 11th hour to come back into your life. As the song goes...you can't keep running in and out of my life.


    Be strong and don't look back. By the way, hope I'm not to late with my response. Good Luck!!!

    The real question is do you love him? There would lie your answer.

    Sometimes a leopard does change its spots..If you have problems in your marriage, a councellor will tell you to have a chat, look at ways to change, and maybe he has been to seek advice, hence the changed behaviour.
    The second issue is the fact you state that you are now divorcing him for the second time, which tells me there have been problems in the past. I would also like to say that sometimes mums know best, and she has noticed his behaviour change, there could be a clue there..you have been seperated 15 months, and he has been Mr nice guy for 6 months, so that tells me you have been seeing each other for a while during the seperation..its your decision only, and you have to live with that ( or without it )..what i would advise is..Divorce, stay friends, see how it goes..but as you have had 2 bites of the cherry, i wouldnt hold out much hope...and i wish you all the luck in the world..

    I have decided to go ahead with the Separation/Divorce....I just have to settle and then it will be finished all bar the Divorce hearing that is....many thanks to those that answered...D

    im sorry but its bad just feel good and doesent work web datig



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