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    my daughter told me i worry too much. what's a good response?

    i tell her so little of my life and my chronic pain. she was quite rude in saying it. ooooph!

    +3  Views: 1064 Answers: 13 Posted: 10 years ago
    melandrupert

    sorry to hear this itsmee I know what you mean its hard not to say anything but use it as a passing thought if you know what I mean :-)

    13 Answers

    I do worry. I heard a saying.....Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday

    itsmee

    I wrote that on my calender. It's the quote of the month, friendindeed.
    friendindeed

    itsmee...thanks
    you tell her nothing at all is wrong!let her enjoy enjoy her childhood as long as possible. lifes moves to fast! she'll know on her own, all to soon.
    itsmee

    She's 33, but you are right daren. I'm : X
    WORRY HAS NO POSITIVE OUTCOME IT IS A WASTE OF ENERGY
    Keep your chin up! It's too bad that you have felt so low. Do hope things look brighter for you! There are some very caring people on this site! I've found that out! :)
    Thanks for coming back & telling us what you think. Very few people do and it leaves you wondering if they even stopped by to read the answers. I didn't pick up on the depression & I should have. Chronic pain certainly can cause it and you've realised that. Are you getting it treated? That is something the right medication can help. Take care.
    itsmee

    maybe we can get more people to repond. it makes it more fun and interesting. my back pain is treated ... but it's never enough! : )
    If that is her attitude it's time to stop hiding the truth. (I am assuming she's an adult.) How can she help if she doesn't know you're in pain, or even be tactful? You don't have to whine... not a good idea... or tell her more than once... that is whining... but make an opportunity to talk to her and explain what is wrong, how it's being treated, and how you feel... if you need her help, say so... and with what... don't leave her feeling you expect to be waited on hand & foot if you mean will she pop round on Mondays to put the rubbish out. I think you'll get a good response. If you don't, and she tells you again that you worry too much the sharp answer is "Somebody has to, since you don't". Go for it.
    Maybe you are, maybe you are not, what do you think?
    How old is your daughter? My thought is that you can tell her anything its just how you word it according to her age, she will comprehend it according to her maturity .If you think by telling her that you are loading her up with pressure or worry then just tell her in a simple way and answer any questions she might ask .
    itsmee

    she's 33 and lives a life of privilege. however, she's always been that way. i just accept it the way it is and then some times i shout.
    nothing can be said yet ,but when she has her own family and her daughter turns and says to her "you worry to much" just grin and say now you know, then she will no how much you care

    Hmmmmmm?

    your answers gave me comfort-understanding. i said, "sure i worry. i worry double so you don't have to worry at all." i'll be glad when the family dinner is over. somehow i feel like i'm at the bottom of the pecking order. depression is a part of chronic pain - that's a given. thank you all.
    I agree with dwayne that worrying is not good, my mom used to say someday you will understand when you have your own children. The reason I worry is because I care, If I didn't you would ask why aren't your concerned about me.

    When you love someone you care, part of caring is concern and thought, naturally a parent has all of these things for their child. The trick is to not worry to much. Trusting your kids judgment is important, once you know that you've raised them the best you could, you have to let go a little. I know it's tough, but that's the empty nest syndrome thing. Hope this helps, sorry for your pain, I deal with the same problem, chronic pain and depression. Feel better, many people really like you here, you are amongst friends. Cheers.
    itsmee

    thanks, pal leeroy. is there a site where we can discuss chronic pain. i had a good place but i got kicked off. i offended the WRONG person.
    leeroy

    That bites, I'm sure there are other sites you can find. I can't stand politics. I like it when people just speak their minds and people are intelligent enough to understand that everyone has a different view of thing and we can't all agree, all of the time.

    Chinese proverb, if you think for three minutes how to solve your problem instead of worrying you could rule the world.

    itsmee

    Well, I have thought of a solution. Some days more than others *smile*


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