Alyssa J.
12 Answers
Colleen
daren1
its time to walk away from this relationship.. before you really play for keeps.. whats more important your freedom or your husband
Alyssa J.
daren1
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
I don't know anything at this point, I feel like just going with it and pretending but this would be for all the wrong reasons. I want him to love and accept me and seems the only way of doing that is to do as he likes because when I say anything negative towards it I get negative abusive comments thrown in my face. I don't know if it's worth going through mental pain over it. I'm sure I'll eventually grow numb to the idea and it will screw me up and then throw me into something sort of like where I'm at now of wanting to end it all. I want to keep him but doing so means putting up with so much. If I leave him I see no real future for me because I don't see myself as being anyone someone would want to be with.
give your self some credit girl.. you didnt get this age to be so stupid . do you honestly think your the only one with marital problens..no i know your the same post as the girl that wants to end her life.. over a shitbag husband grow up and move on . love is unanamous find some one new as hard as it is to move on.. isnt your life worth it to you..i dont even know you .. but i care
I'm trying very hard to forget about this person and what he's turned out to be. I have been nothing but good and gave my all, seems to me he wants someone who will treat him like crap.
ed shank
Threesomes, bad, bad, bad. This relationship is done. But your probably going to stick it out like most abused women do. I simply can't understand why your gender does this. This does not require therapy. Leave now. An open relationship can and does work for some people provided they entered into the relationship with that understanding. However, this apparently was not your original intent, again, leave now.
Alyssa J.
ed shank
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
I agree with you, I'm uncomfortable with it but have learned to shut down my feelings about it. I'm not a bad person yet I'm beginning to believe maybe I'm not good enough so I should get and stay single the rest of my life. He's hurt me deeply yet won't listen or respect my feelings ~ It's always my fault and he makes it sound as though it's a normal part of everyday life. He's tossed me aside like a piece of shit and all I've done was treat him good. I never put anyone before him but I'm last on his list, I'm sick to my stomach with emotions and just want to crawl in a hole and die!!
Everyday you spend with this uncaring creature, is a day lost with someone who will love you. Believe it or not there are good men out there waiting for a good woman to come into their lives. Do what's right.
The days of the three hour lay are for most a thing of the past. How old is he? Perhaps a medical issue. If it's a lack of interest in sex, well what do you think? Women know what turns their man on. Stick your mind in the gutter for a few minutes, something will click.
Alyssa J.
Colleen
Alyssa J.
Colleen
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
He's always shown alot of interest in other women and has even cheated on me. He's 49 now and he wants full permission to cheat with me being ok with it. He tells me (in full detail) about the women he's slept with making me feel less of a woman and crushing my self esteem even further. I don't care to know about how 'fantastic' someone was and I most definitely don't like to be compared to them either.
What he's doing to you is mental abuse. Strong grounds to base a divorce on. Now I know you'll fire back with, "but I love him". Who do you love more? Yourself or him? Who is worth more to you? Yourself or him? Do some deep thinking on this. He will never bring you the happiness you deserve. If you continue to place his needs ahead of yours and remain with him even though he's cheated on you, you will always be the loser with a husband who can not remain hard with you. He is holding sex for ransom in order to get you to agree to his demands. The next time he asks you to agree to let him see others, tell him that day will come when he signs the divorce papers and not before then.
He doesn't care about me or my feelings, I'm alone and empty inside. It's going to take alot for me to get back to a 'normal' person who has any kind of self esteem. I'm the lowest I've ever been in life and I'm deeply hurt. I blame myself for alot of this behavior, the 'if I would have' always comes to mind. Maybe I should have done better though I can't figure out where that fits in. I sit and wonder about myself these days, I don't know what makes me such a bad person who deserves to be treated this way.
"It's going to take alot for me to get back to a 'normal' person who has any kind of self esteem."
Join the millions to billions of women throughout history who have had to go through this very same thing. Some made it, some did not. Which side of the fence will you find yourself on? Are you a survivor or a quitter? It's time to test the strength you think you lack ;)
Join the millions to billions of women throughout history who have had to go through this very same thing. Some made it, some did not. Which side of the fence will you find yourself on? Are you a survivor or a quitter? It's time to test the strength you think you lack ;)
ole hipster
Why the Hell girl....after reading your comments here...do you stay with a degrading (to You) pig (him)like that!.....what does he have....personality plus...doesn't sound like it! Maybe a lot of money? Money is not worth what you are allowing yourself to be put through...think about it...do yourself a favor and examine this toxic relationship and decide what you need and want to do for YOU! life is too short to be with such a jerk!!! (:
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
That's funny, he has absolutely nothing. He's much older than I am with not a damn thing to his name. I'm attached for the simple reason of this being the only person I've ever shared my life with and the thought of not having that is scary to me. Starting over with someone new doesn't seem like an option for me not now or in the future. Things seem hopeless right now filled with tons of pain.
IluvJesus
If he's craving another woman than it's not a real marriage,he married you alone,if he's not happy with just you it's sure time to move on,you just have to find the strength to pull yourself together and walk.Once you move on you will find someone who will love you for you and you alone,but next time you'll be prepared,enabling you to let the next man know what you will and will not tolerate all up front.What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.God bless!
Alyssa J.
IluvJesus
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
This is killing me terribly but I'm getting to the point of accepting the realities of it and possibly moving on. I don't plan on living if I'm to have forever constant pain inside of me.
I'm in a second marriage,my first one was 10 yrs. of hell,he cheated on me with more than a handful of women and even fathered a child 9 months into our marriage when I was 8 months pregnant with my first baby.I divorced him and now I'm happily married to my soul mate,we have an awesome marriage and I'm finally happy.It hurts like hell at first kinda like an open wound,but once it heals you never look back,and if you don't move on,you deny yourself the happiness you deserve.You can do it!
caroline
Have you asked your husband what he'd like you to do?
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 1 | |
Yes, he's always coming up with these crazy fantasies about other women. He wants me to allow him to have sex with others as I go out and do the same but has mentioned nothing about 'us', seems he wants another man to take care of me sexually so he won't have to deal with it. I know he's bored and I've accepted it though I don't like it.
he'll get hard eventually.. with or without sex
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 0 | |
He's going to regret treating me like shit once I'm gone because I'm the one who does so much for him and loves him as I do. I place him first in life.
Jenn
TALK TO HIM!!!! Get playful... dont judge.
Jenn
Alyssa J.
Jenn
Alyssa J.
Colleen
Jenn
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 0 | |
If you have alreadt brought another women to bed with you... You have sailed that ship.. and it is going to be hard to tell him you are not ok with it
We've had another woman before and I didn't like the way he went out of his way to kind of push me aside and give her full attention. He knows I'm uncomfortable but the only way I can keep him interested is through another woman or with a stiff dick pill. I alone am no longer enough so I'm thinking he doesn't love me anymore.
it was somethng new of course he was into her... those pills are our friends... IF he is having an issue you should be ok with medical help. Stop accepting that he needs another women and let him know you can be what he needs sexually. If he has dirty ideas roll with it.. Be striaght.. dont beat around the bush...
He only needs those pills with me and that woman who was in our bedroom was manlier than he is. She's a lesbian who looks like a boy. I'm 100% woman who isn't fat or ugly, I'm very attractive and 14 years younger than he is but apparently just not enough. I've tried everything yet it's been a waste of time.
She is not a lesbian if she allowed him to touch her in any sexual manner. She is bi-sexual. She does not fit in the homosexual world just as much as she does not fit in the heterosexual world.
New is exciting... I dont know that you are looking for ways to fix things.. It sounds like you have had enough of his bs... If so... dont waste your time feeling bad about yourself.. You know you are hott. You can be treated like you want to be... And learn from your mistakes...
I don't know why people get married if they want new and exciting every day of their lives. He's destroyed my life and doesn't care. I don't see myself ever getting over this one because the pain is so deep. No woman wants to be second or last on the list for his time and attention.
zorro
Just dump the bastard. He has no respect for you. Get yourself tested for the disease.
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 0 | |
Wow, you have this right. He shows no love or respect for my feeling or wishes. I hope I can find someone who will.
Alyssa J.
I have to accept the fact that he's no longer sexually interested in me for whatever reason. I'm no longer able to arouse him without either the 'other woman' or some sort of 'cock pill'. It's going to take time but time will heal.
Dollybird
| 12 years ago. Rating: 0 | |
Alyssa J,
It seems as though all you do is, trying to make your husband happy, and you get no respect for it. Dont you think its time, you made yourself happy for change. Find some male that will put you first, and start enjoying your life. Time is slipping by.
It seems as though all you do is, trying to make your husband happy, and you get no respect for it. Dont you think its time, you made yourself happy for change. Find some male that will put you first, and start enjoying your life. Time is slipping by.
We've been together for several years so I'm not the 17 year old he married. I believe he's bored with me because though sex is great for me, he's not all that into it. I have to resort to other options for help in keeping him aroused because I alone don't have what it takes anymore. I don't get the compliments he praises others with which are usually trashy porn women or women who are less attractive than I am. He doesn't just say it once but keeps it going which makes me feel as though he's rubbing it in my face. I know I'm not who he thinks of when he's with me. I can't keep it hard or get it to ejaculate so I'm giving up, not going to worry about it anymore. It is what it is and I knew this day will come. Sex isn't even half of what it used to be and I'm hurt.
caroline
Alyssa J.
| 12 years ago. Rating: 0 | |
wow, sorry to hear Alyssa. It sounds as though your husband has "checked out" emotionally and physically with regard to your relationship. It also sounds as though he's treating you in an emotionally abusive manner by comparing you to 'porn women.' Sounds like cutting your ties to this guy may be the best option for you as difficult as it may be. No one deserves to be treated with such disrespect by their spouse.
Thank you so much, I've been thinking about leaving him and hopefully meeting someone who will appreciate me as I am. He tells me he's into me yet never shows it. I wear cute clothes for him in the bedroom and have spent alot of money on sexy shoes. I almost have to beg in order to get something out of him which is never these days. I ask and he says no or who are we bringing over? It's not about me anymore, he's selfish.
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