Bob/PKB
In a spinoff from the question about the gay couple whose engagement photo was altered and used as a political weapon, let's put this question out for comments.
Do gay couples (Male or Female) make better parents than a heterosexual couple? If so, why. If not, why not?
Let's forgo the one-word answers. Back up your opinion with reasoning, studies, and/or stats.
11 Answers
Shootah
Best answer!
I don't think anyone's sexual orientation matters in regards to being a good parent. It's more upon the individual in regards to how good a parent they are, in their willingness to give of themself and place their child above and before themself.
Whether or not someone has the ability to be a good parent doesn't originate in someone's gender, race, or sexual preference. Just as many parents already know, it's about that willingness to give up their own life to watch over another...and even a person's financial status doesn't matter there either. I say this, as money can't buy a parent giving their child the love they need and should have...although it has the potential of making things easier.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 12 | |
Colleen
One article
By: Stephanie Pappas, LiveScience Senior Writer
Published: 01/16/2012 08:19 AM EST on LiveScience
Gay marriage, and especially gay parenting, has been in the cross hairs in recent days.
On Jan. 6, Republican presidential hopeful Rick Santorum told a New Hampshire audience that children are better off with a father in prison than being raised in a home with lesbian parents and no father at all. And last Monday (Jan. 9), Pope Benedict called gay marriage a threat "to the future of humanity itself," citing the need for children to have heterosexual homes.
But research on families headed by gays and lesbians doesn't back up these dire assertions. In fact, in some ways, gay parents may bring talents to the table that straight parents don't.
Gay parents "tend to be more motivated, more committed than heterosexual parents on average, because they chose to be parents," said Abbie Goldberg, a psychologist at Clark University in Massachusetts who researches gay and lesbian parenting. Gays and lesbians rarely become parents by accident, compared with an almost 50 percent accidental pregnancy rate among heterosexuals, Goldberg said. "That translates to greater commitment on average and more involvement."
And while research indicates that kids of gay parents show few differences in achievement, mental health, social functioning and other measures, these kids may have the advantage of open-mindedness, tolerance and role models for equitable relationships, according to some research. Not only that, but gays and lesbians are likely to provide homes for difficult-to-place children in the foster system, studies show.
Much more to read here > http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/16/gay-parents-better-than-straights_n_1208659.html
Another article
Research shows that overall, the children of same-sex couples are often more resilient and well-adjusted than the offspring of heterosexual couples. While some studies suggest similar academic achievement, other research shows that children reared by same-sex parents perform slightly better. When comparing heterosexual and gay parenting, children of gay couples fare just as well in areas of self-esteem, gender identity, and emotional health.
Said local Perrysburg resident, Jeri Mullen, "I don't think same gendered parents are any different from the traditonal man-woman parents. It seems to me that if the parents love eachother and raise the child as a couple, the chidlren will be well-adjusted and happy."
While many argue that gay couples will ultimately raise gay children, there is no evidence that supports this theory; many studies suggest that kids raised by gay males usually adopt a straight identity. Interestingly, children raised by lesbian couples often appear to be more nurturing toward others, less judgmental and aggressive, and not as concerned about the segregation of "girl and boy" toys than heterosexual kids.http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2005/10/12/health/webmd/main938234.shtml
Jessica Lundgren, a Chautauqua County parent of a toddler aged son, supported these findings:
'It's ridiculous to think that anyone has the right to say any other person is less capable to parent because of their sexual preference. In fact, their experience in dealing with others' ignorance and intolerance could help in producing more patient, nurturing, supportive parents and children."
Findings also point to the play of children parented by gay couples as more androgynous, which may be attributed to more exposure to equal roles in the home as compared to straight households.
Divorced children of gay couples, especially lesbians, usually experience more frequent contact with fathers versus heterosexual parents. Gay parents also appear to have a stronger extended social support system than children of heterosexual couples. Although offspring of same-sex couples often experience ostracism, some international gains have been achieved. The United Kingdom has recognized gay male couples this year with a new surrogacy lawhttp://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2010/mar/28/surrogacy-gay-me, granting them the right to be placed on their surrogate child's birth certificate for the first time in history.
While advancements have been made in regard to same-sex parenting, continuing advocacy through writing, education, and seminars is always needed to invoke positive lasting changes.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/01/16/gay-parents-better-than-straights_n_1208659.html
Wiki-pedia
Scientific research has been generally consistent in showing that gay and lesbian parents are as fit and capable as heterosexual parents, and their children are as psychologically healthy and well-adjusted as children reared by heterosexual parents.[3][4][5] Major associations of mental health professionals in the U.S., Canada, and Australia have not identified credible empirical research that suggests otherwise.[5][6][7][8][9] Based on the robust nature of the evidence available in the field, the Third District Court of Appeal of the State of Florida was satisfied in 2010 that the issue is so far beyond dispute that it would be irrational to hold otherwise, and concluded that the best interests of children are not preserved by prohibiting homosexual adoption.[10]
Why gay parents are needed:
Gay adoption recently caused controversy in Illinois, where Catholic Charities adoption services decided in November to cease offering services because the state refused funding unless the groups agreed not to discriminate against gays and lesbians. Rather than comply, Catholic Charities closed up shop.
Catholic opposition aside, research suggests that gay and lesbian parents are actually a powerful resource for kids in need of adoption. According to a 2007 report by the Williams Institute and the Urban Institute, 65,000 kids were living with adoptive gay parents between 2000 and 2002, with another 14,000 in foster homes headed by gays and lesbians. (There are currently more than 100,000 kids in foster care in the U.S.)
An October 2011 report by Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute found that, of gay and lesbian adoptions at more than 300 agencies, 10 percent of the kids placed were older than 6 — typically a very difficult age to adopt out. About 25 percent were older than 3. Sixty percent of gay and lesbian couples adopted across races, which is important given that minority children in the foster system tend to linger. More than half of the kids adopted by gays and lesbians had special needs.
The report didn't compare the adoption preferences of gay couples directly with those of heterosexual couples, said author David Brodzinsky, research director at the Institute and co-editor of "Adoption By Lesbians and Gay Men: A New Dimension of Family Diversity" (Oxford University Press, 2011). But research suggests that gays and lesbians are more likely than heterosexuals to adopt older, special-needs and minority children, he said. Part of that could be their own preferences, and part could be because of discrimination by adoption agencies that puts more difficult children with what caseworkers see as "less desirable" parents.
Something to think about; these children being adopted by gay couples are the unwanted children born to heterosexual couples and are also the kids not wanted by heterosexual couples looking to adopt.
Need more?
As long as the children are well loved, well nurtured and well educated, who parents them does not matter in my opinion.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 14 | |
dowsa
I don't give a HOOT parents GAY or not its bringing up children .Never heard of homosexual couples putting kids in homes for adoption have you ? On the other hand heterosexual couples put children into homes .fighting in front of kids.Drugs DRINK.no food on the table ,all to common.So leave the gays alone.They make better parents 99%.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 11 | |
Thank you for a good answer.
sunnyB
Chiangmai
The expression "I love my children unconditionally" is heard my entire life, yet it is becoming meaningless at times. "Unconditional" is just that: unconditional. Whether or not the child is straight or gay, good or bad, pretty or otherwise, we should all treat them the way we have always proclaimed to treat them, that is to love them unconditionally.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 8 | |
tabber
Thanks Bob for asking this question. It really touches me on a very deep level. Reason being I have been working with kids & families for 20 years or more. I am still working with a few right now. Believe me it truly does not matter if parents are gay, straight, bears or ufo's. What truly matters is that the parents love or at least like the kids and have RESPECT for their being. Most cases that I have seen and the problem with kids it that grown ups do not respect them, nor hear them, particularly their own parents. Getting sane kids is dependent on having a half way sane mom. more so than having a sane dad.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
nomdeplume
Assuming that the statistic that 50% of children are unplanned is correct, I have a cunning plan to ensure that almost all children are planned and wanted:
All boys at puberty would give a sperm sample which would be stored for their lifetime. They would then be given vasectomies, and could therefore enjoy themselves without fear of unwanted pregnancies. The sperm sample would be used to fertilise their partners when they were sufficiently mature to become parents. Sperm taken at say 13 would be of good quality and volume and could also be accessed by lesbians wanting to conceive. Male gays would have to adopt.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 7 | |
LOG IN
Click here>>http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/our-gender-ourselves/201201/parenting-gay-or-straight-how-does-it-matter
| 11 years ago. Rating: 4 | |
ed shank
I'm inclined to think that a gay couple would be more nurturing in most instances. The problem is not life at home but the reactions from other young people they have to interact with. Children can be very cruel. The offspring of a straight homophobic couple will more than likely be influenced negatively towards a youngster raised by a gay couple due to negative comments heard at home.
| 11 years ago. Rating: 3 | |
bluevioletshinez
robertgrist
