Karma: 945575

NOT A FRIEND ANYMORE....

....is the person who lied to me months ago and tries to BS me now. If you are my friend, you are truthful with me; even if I don't like what you say, it is far better than lying to me. The lie is not the issue, the lying IS. I want to end the pseudo-friendship on a clean note (no bad guy, no ugly scene). Just never speaking again is not an option. Any suggestions?

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+5 Views: 819 Answers: 6 Posted: 15 years ago

Bob/PKB

What if I made the person feel like I couldn't be told the truth? That doesn't make ME much of a friend, does it? This is getting complicated. Do I owe an apology for making someone who HAS been a good friend so uncomfortable that telling ME the truth is too scary?

Commented 15 years ago

6 Answers

pythonlover

Karma: 797316

Best answer!

There is a saying....You can trust a thief,but you can't trust a liar.If you really have to be in this persons company and the lying continues ,you may very well have to make them aware that you know what they are saying is a lie.If you are letting them get away with it,it is an insult to your intelligence.

15 years ago. Rating: 6
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Bob/PKB

That's what I've been thinking. I can do this in a nice way, too, which will not disrupt the "have to" time together. Thank you for a good answer.

commented 15 years ago

Poppy3

Yeah so true pythonlover.

commented 15 years ago

FISH-O

Karma: 954810

I had a friend that I knew for many years and her problem was actually 'Compulsive lying'. It took me a long time to figure this out and now that she is gone I am realizing how many lies I was told...very confusing. I don't think any less of her.

If the lies are hurting you then as jhharlan suggested... keep contact to a minimum.

15 years ago. Rating: 8
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jhharlan

Karma: 1457220

Just don't speak again. You owe no explanation or excuses. Just forget about it and move on....

15 years ago. Rating: 7
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Bob/PKB

We are on a team that meets weekly and have to have some interaction. To never speak again won't work. It would be childish under the circumstances and inappropriate for a number of other reasons. Easier, yes, without a doubt.

commented 15 years ago

jhharlan

Then just stick with the subject and avoid small talk....

commented 15 years ago

Chiangmai